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Dumpshock Forums _ Shadowrun _ New Ideas for Gear and Tactics

Posted by: Panzergeist Jan 23 2004, 03:48 AM

I just got a funny idea for an infiltration tactic. It occurs to me that gnomes are so small, you could easily make a small homemade catapul to launch them out of. So, suppose you mount a small catapult, or even an air cannon, on a van. Then you launch a gnome shaman out of it, over a wall and into the courtyard of a compound. The gnome casts catfall to land safely. He could also be invisible. Of course, then it occured to me that there is a gecko crawling spell that could replace both the cannon and the catfall spell.

My other idea is one I got in my criminology class a few months ago. It's an assrape protection device called the assguard. Basicly, its a small plastic tube 2 inches wide and 3 or 4 inches long. There are a few thin razor blades running along the inside of it. A prisoner could put one up his ass to rip up any other prisoner who tries to make him his bitch. My criminology classmates loved that idea.

Posted by: Slamm-O Jan 23 2004, 03:52 AM

you learn about assraping in criminology? or am i just really lost...

Posted by: Siege Jan 23 2004, 03:52 AM

To the first idea:

Dwarf tossing and similar launching platforms for adepts have been explored by various groups, including using a troll instead of the launching platform.

As to the second idea:

I've never actually been so worried about my anal safety as to voluntarily cram a bit of plastic tubing where the sun never shines, but points for imagination...

-Siege

Posted by: Domino Jan 23 2004, 10:27 AM

So basically to keep from getting analy raped you would shove for all intent and purpose a dildo up your ass.

Right.

Posted by: Quix Jan 23 2004, 11:22 AM

Gnomish cannons... I'm simultaneously reminded of the Gnomes of Mount Nevermind and Nodwick, poor bugger.

Posted by: Phaeton Jan 23 2004, 11:59 AM

Good runners use anal protection devices.

Better runners never get caught and sent to places where they need such things.

But if you absolutely refuse to be a prison bitch...(Although I'd rather have my character bitchslap the guy with his cyber-shockhands. )

Posted by: Liquid_Obsidian Jan 23 2004, 12:35 PM

or maybe an armored cyberasshole with DNI linked blades ?
assrippers ?
and maybe a drill penis for psycho-penislacerated-jailbirds ?

Posted by: mfb Jan 23 2004, 01:03 PM

not just a plastic tube, a plastic tube full of razors.

i think i'd probably just hang myself with my bedsheets, and get it over with.

Posted by: Backgammon Jan 23 2004, 01:16 PM

Hmm, that anal protection thing is kinda like the dentata from Snow Crash

Posted by: Zazen Jan 23 2004, 03:44 PM

QUOTE (Domino)

So basically to keep from getting analy raped you would shove for all intent and purpose a dildo up your ass.

One that is two inches in diameter.

Posted by: Arethusa Jan 23 2004, 04:58 PM

QUOTE (Backgammon)

Hmm, that anal protection thing is kinda like the dentata from Snow Crash

I think this is a tad more vicious.

Posted by: Spookymonster Jan 23 2004, 05:31 PM

QUOTE (Panzergeist)

Of course, then it occured to me that there is a gecko crawling spell that could replace both the cannon and the catfall spell.

Levitate works even better, especially if the walls you're planning on scaling are electrified/razorwired/mined.

Any suggestions on how to avoid becoming Tossed Salad Man's biyatch as well?

Posted by: Req Jan 23 2004, 05:46 PM

The afore-mentioned STAY OUT OF JAIL.

Posted by: Zazen Jan 23 2004, 05:53 PM

Yeah, make him your bitch.

Posted by: Dash Panther Jan 25 2004, 12:31 AM

...

Posted by: Phaeton Jan 25 2004, 01:09 AM

@ Req: *nod. nodnod. nodnodnodnodnod.*

@ Zazen: What Dash Panther said...

Posted by: Siege Jan 25 2004, 04:39 AM

A reverse-implanted cybersnake.

Nobody will ever ask "what crawled up your ass?" twice.

Failing that, a 9 volt battery and two leads.."nothin says lovin like shakin' bacon in the oven"

-Siege