Can a Penile Implant be Hacked? and a few other questions., This is why you shouldn't allow girls or gay men in your games... Options Track this topic Email this topic Print this topic Download this topic Subscribe to this forum Display Modes Switch to: Outline Standard Switch to: Linear+

[Bushw4cker]

A few questions that have come up in Recent Run
and I'm seriously reconsidering letting girls and my gay male friend play with us anymore...grrrr...
Can a Penile Implant be Hacked? and what kind of Havoc could a Hacker wreck if he got control of one?
Can Penile Implants be Modular?

[eyeBliss]

I'm thinking about the same kind of havoc you could cause by crushing up a few viagra and putting them in someone's drink, with perhaps more controlled results. You might be able to cause some significant discomfort or social awkwardness, but, contrary to popular opinion, the penile implant isn't doing any decision making. Regarding the second part of your question, I can't think of any reason a penile implant couldn't be modular when other cyber limbs or portion thereof can be.

[Doc Chase]

What would the purpose be of putting a penile implant on your wireless PAN? It's got DNI, if it needs interfacing at all. If other people want to activate it, they certainly have other methods at their disposal.


How much more innuendo can we fit into this thread? Dumpshockers, go forth!

[Blade]

Like any other implants, it can be hacked if:
- Wireless access is on (which I doubt is the case most of the time)
- The hacker can reach the implant's signal, which most probably isn't the case, except if you have it broadcast everywhere "HEY LOOK, IT'S MY PENIS!". It is most probably in reach of your commlink, that the hacker can hack to get access to the penile implant.
Then it's up to the GM to decide what features a Penile Implant could have that would be accessible through a Matrix connection (as opposed to the nerve connection to the body). It'll obvisously have basic diagnosis functionality (to show the time until next revision) maybe some stats, maybe some functions that the user or his partner can activate or parameters that can be tweaked (vibration, size, speed, lubrication).
Maybe people into virtual sex/distant relationship could have them completely stimulated through a Matrix connection.

A simpler way would be to ask your player what (s)he wants to do and think whether there's a case of legitimate use where it would be useful to be able to do it from a Matrix connection. If there is, it's possible, if there isn't it probably isn't.

[Xahn Borealis]

Have a sprite use the Sparky or Gremlins power (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[Bushw4cker]

Have a sprite use the Sparky or Gremlins power (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

LOL

[Yerameyahu]

Ditto what Blade said. While the cyberware-hacking rules are very vague, certain assumptions are easy. You can access things that make sense to be accessible, you (the owner) can disable any given actions or connections (no wireless at all, slaved, etc.), and they don't have functions that don't make sense. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

And you can't control cyberlimbs easily or conveniently, because it'd break the game (and also not make sense).

[Mr. Mage]

A few questions that have come up in Recent Run
and I'm seriously reconsidering letting girls and my gay male friend play with us anymore...grrrr...
Can a Penile Implant be Hacked? and what kind of Havoc could a Hacker wreck if he got control of one?
Can Penile Implants be Modular?

Ok...didn't expect it to be girls that would think of doing something like this....since us guys are SOOOO much more immature... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[Xahn Borealis]

Ok...didn't expect it to be girls that would think of doing something like this....since us guys are SOOOO much more immature... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Especially here on Dumpshock.

[Bushw4cker]

Ok...didn't expect it to be girls that would think of doing something like this....since us guys are SOOOO much more immature... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Oh they are Much worse...

I posted this a while ago about one of our gaming sessions

The Runners where meeting a contact in Hawaii, at a small restaurant/bar. They were in search of some research data on a powerful magical item that S-K was also hunting for. An agent from S-K was following them to their meet and was recording the runners conversation. The runners, noticed the woman and as she left to go the restroom, excused themselves and followed her in (Both Runners are Female). The runners confronted the woman took her in a stall and proceeded to interrogate her, just as she was about to reveal her employer, the cranial bomb went off, sending blood everywhere. (Now the runners where rolling incredibly while ALL my NPCs where botching their rolls, and continued to do so) Only one server in the restaurant noticed the noise in the restroom and went to investigate the scene. The Server seeing the blood on the floor critically glitches a Logic + Intuition test and asks "Oh my god, is everything all right in there?" Lydia, the Mystic Adept peeks from the stall holding a tampon (She actually has them written in her Gear) says "Just having a very heavy period right now, thanks." That line stopped our group from gaming for about 20 minutes as we were all laughing so hard, we tried about two times to get going again and failed. The combination of bad NPC dice rolls, timing, and funny line, had me laughing harder then I have ever remembered when gaming. The line only gave the runners half a minute till other staff came to investigate, but they got out.

Best Reply to that post about Tampons and RFID tags from Sengir

This is your friendly Mega-Mall Network. Your tampon has just reached 75% capacity you do not seem to be carrying a spare one. Proceed two aisles down to your right for this week's special offers in female hygiene, with NERPS for perfect protection in all situations.

[Udoshi]

Ok...didn't expect it to be girls that would think of doing something like this....since us guys are SOOOO much more immature... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

Girls are often JUST as dirty as guys, perhaps even more so.

Good luck ever getting them to admit it, though.

[Mr. Mage]

Girls are often JUST as dirty as guys, perhaps even more so.

Good luck ever getting them to admit it, though.

Guys don't need to admit it. We have somehow managed to go through life hopping on one foot because the other one is constantly in our mouth.

[James McMurray]

My penile implant is only accessible via skinlink.

said the creepy old guy to the hot elf hacker chick

[Bushw4cker]

My penile implant is only accessible via skinlink.

said the creepy old guy to the hot elf hacker chick

BEST 2073 pick up line EVER Lol

[Fortinbras]

When my girlfriend read Augmentation, she was upset that while there was a penile implant, there was nothing for the ladies. She suggested something that changes flavors, like at a malt shop. Half my group, the girls, then spent the next half hour talking about various vaginal implant cyberware options while the boys looked embarrassed.
It would have been hilarious had it not brought the game to a halt.

[X-Kalibur]

When my girlfriend read Augmentation, she was upset that while there was a penile implant, there was nothing for the ladies. She suggested something that changes flavors, like at a malt shop. Half my group, the girls, then spent the next half hour talking about various vaginal implant cyberware options while the boys looked embarrassed.
It would have been hilarious had it not brought the game to a halt.

Can I just get malt flavor?

[CanRay]

Great, now I have an idea for a titty bar where the women serve you draft from their cyberbreasts...

[Socinus]

Hacking cyberware for giggles is awesome.

My technomancer did it to one of our targets a while back. He had a Balance Augment (or some such device) as well as Cybereyes. While he was using a stationary bike, my technomancer hacked into the guy's PAN, then hacked into the stationary bike he was on. He also hacked into the stationary bike and set it to randomly adjust resistance, then set the guy's Balance Augment to adjust randomly every few seconds, then shut his cybereyes off.

He pitched foreward, slammed his face on the bike, then hopped off only to go staggering off crashing onto the floor.

Good times.

[toturi]

Great, now I have an idea for a titty bar where the women serve you draft from their cyberbreasts...

Too... much... information...

[CanRay]

Great, now I have an idea for a titty bar where the women serve you draft from their cyberbreasts...

Too... much... information...

Depends, this might be how Hooters is able to stay in business. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)

I think I might try to work on a business propos...

Never mind, damnit. Stupid lack of technology.

EDIT: And where's my Rocket Pack, damnit!

[Glyph]

When my girlfriend read Augmentation, she was upset that while there was a penile implant, there was nothing for the ladies. She suggested something that changes flavors, like at a malt shop. Half my group, the girls, then spent the next half hour talking about various vaginal implant cyberware options while the boys looked embarrassed.
It would have been hilarious had it not brought the game to a halt.

Actually, they... do have cyberglands in Augmentation.

[hyzmarca]

What would the purpose be of putting a penile implant on your wireless PAN? It's got DNI, if it needs interfacing at all. If other people want to activate it, they certainly have other methods at their disposal.


How much more innuendo can we fit into this thread? Dumpshockers, go forth!

So you can load your MP3s onto it, of course.

Is that Marvin Gaye in your pants or are you just happy to see me?

[CanRay]

Barry White, there is no substitute!

[Xahn Borealis]

Well, I do need to fill my quota for penis jokes today....


A Blood Circuit Control System would work as a cock ring.

[Stahlseele]

Well,it gives logging/plugging in a whole new meaning . .

[CanRay]

Don't forget that, in Shadowrun, "Slot" is another term for f***. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)

EDIT: Which just made me think of a whole new meaning to "Slot and Run".

[Xahn Borealis]

"I slotted the slot in the slot, for slot's sake."

[Ascalaphus]

and I'm seriously reconsidering letting girls and my gay male friend play with us anymore...grrrr...

What, just because we like making you breeders squirm? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)

A cyberpenis would have some sort of tactile sensors on it. If you hack it, you could mess with those - and that's gonna mess up a guy pretty good.

It makes me think about those hacker nanites - they infiltrate implants and turn on the wireless. So you walk up to the guy, spill a "drink" on his lap, and fun will commence...

When my girlfriend read Augmentation, she was upset that while there was a penile implant, there was nothing for the ladies. She suggested something that changes flavors, like at a malt shop. Half my group, the girls, then spent the next half hour talking about various vaginal implant cyberware options while the boys looked embarrassed.
It would have been hilarious had it not brought the game to a halt.

Something like the Dentata in Snow Crash?

[hyzmarca]

There is something to be said for a gland, either cyber or bioware, that releases artificial flavoring.

[Stahlseele]

Get chocolate, if you really wanna give her something . .

[Xahn Borealis]

Get chocolate, if you really wanna give her something . .

(IMG:style_emoticons/default/eek.gif)
(IMG:style_emoticons/default/love.gif)
(IMG:style_emoticons/default/embarrassed.gif)

[Bushw4cker]

I thought this Topic would get more responses....sigh, but the responses so far have been hilarious at least

[Bushw4cker]

I was thinking that Hacker could cause similar Effect as the Orgasm spell...

[Bushw4cker]

I'm just posting this to get post 100!!

[Xahn Borealis]

I think we're holding in a lot of things we want to say on the topic, for fear of Squicking out those with weaker wills.

[CanRay]

This is Dumpshock. There are no weak wills!

[Xahn Borealis]

Then I can post all the TMI I want?

[Glyph]

Wireless is a dumb idea for most cyberware, especially as the default, in a setting where people know that anything with a wireless link can be hacked.

But contemplating who might have it set on wireless... imagine someone who is the submissive in a 24/7 D/S relationship. If their dominant partner had wireless control over their submissive's cyberorgan, wow. Talk about total control. It's even creepier when you think about something similar being done non-consensually, by metahuman traffickers.

[Xahn Borealis]

I always find it weird how everyone here's always so blasé about Bunrakus.

[CanRay]

I'm willing to bet that Wireless set-ups for cybernetics would be taking a nosedive after the Technomancer scare.

[Bigity]

Probably to avoid thinking about the realities of one. That's some black stuff to float around in your head.

[Xahn Borealis]

*changes the subject* WHALES! EVERYONE THINK ABOUT WHALES!

[Bushw4cker]

*changes the subject* WHALES! EVERYONE THINK ABOUT WHALES!

Sperm Whales!

[Yerameyahu]

Humpback whales? :/

[Xahn Borealis]

Google images? Shall I?

[Faraday]

Humpback whales? :/

Narwhals, jedi of the sea?

[Snow_Fox]

It would be a dirtaction for a guy, usless in a straight fight, embarrassing in a bar but maybe, just maybe very, very useful if you can sneak the effect on an unsuspecting guard or decker.

, contrary to popular opinion, the penile implant isn't doing any decision making.

In my experience it is as consitent as the male mind.

[Xahn Borealis]

I can certainly see some guys IQ rising dramatically if their dick had an off-switch. Including me (IMG:style_emoticons/default/frown.gif)

[Sephiroth]

In my experience it is as consitent as the male mind.

I like how unbiased that statement is. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/ohplease.gif)

[Xahn Borealis]

A lot of guys are, to put it bluntly (pardon the pun), dicks. I know girls can be too, but IMO, the drek we do sometimes is fragged up. IMO, an ideal world should consist solely of women, with hermaphrodites for breeding.

[Yerameyahu]

Oh, lord. Not this crap. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)

[Sephiroth]

A lot of guys are, to put it bluntly (pardon the pun), dicks. I know girls can be too, but IMO, the drek we do sometimes is fragged up. IMO, an ideal world should consist solely of women, with hermaphrodites for breeding.

I know exactly what you're talking about, but that kind of thing has more to do with a lack of empathy (and, though this probably fades with maturity, being enamored with their penis) than a lack of intelligence and/or competence. And it's also not like lack of empathy is a universal trait among the male population.

/derail

[Wounded Ronin]

A few questions that have come up in Recent Run
and I'm seriously reconsidering letting girls and my gay male friend play with us anymore...grrrr...
Can a Penile Implant be Hacked? and what kind of Havoc could a Hacker wreck if he got control of one?
Can Penile Implants be Modular?

No girls allowed! LOL.

[CanRay]

But if we ban the gays, then we'd have to ban the lesbians...

And then there'd be no Lesbian Elf Stripper Ninjas.

And that just plain wouldn't be Shadowrun, would it?

[Glyph]

No danger of that. Shadowrun has more guys playing elven lesbians than any other game, which means that Shadowrun players are the most tolerant and broad-minded of all roleplayers.

[Ascalaphus]

It takes a special kind of guy to work under the kind of pressure that hacking a penile implant can put him under.

[Xahn Borealis]

OH NO ITS TVTROPES SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR MORNING

Cute.

[Stahlseele]

The best part about the penile implant would be the ability to tone down feeling in it.
Everybody and their mom aims for a guys junk in a brawl, because it's fucking effective most of the time.
As long as you don't have somebody who does not feel any pain at all in that moment, you have felled one guy, no matter how big usually.
If you have somebody who does not feel any pain at that moment, he will beat you into a bloody pulp because he will be very hurt later on.
Now simply toning down the feelings down there before a brawl would be an advantage because you get one attack of opportunity, when somebody tries that and does not get the hoped for result.
And later on you simply turn it back up and it is as if nothing had happened . . and for the workaholics, it should be detacheable too . .
*comlink rings right in the middle of sexy fun times with partner* "Sorry Honey, gotta go, here, have fun without me 'till i'm back!" *click*

[Xahn Borealis]

But it's the balls that hurt?

[Stahlseele]

*shrugs* i'd think they'd be included in the penile implant . .

[Xahn Borealis]

They just get covered with synth skin.

[Bushw4cker]

Imagine the Possibilities with a modular Penile Implant, it would make those long distance relationships easier...
What would be the Damage Code on Modular Penile Implant?
(Str/2 +1)S
(Str/2 +2)S Reach 1 (Troll Penile Implant)

[Stahlseele]

Modular Cyberlimb, combine with penile implant and Jackhammer Attachment. Make bubba run.

[Bushw4cker]

Video from comedy Central Lost Penis

[Stahlseele]

i wondered when anybody would post a link to that song *g*

[Bushw4cker]

Bah Can't find good clip S01E06 Ugly Americans

[CanRay]

*Sings the song "Detachable Penis" in the key of off*

[Snow_Fox]

But if we ban the gays, then we'd have to ban the lesbians...

And then there'd be no Lesbian Elf Stripper Ninjas.

And that just plain wouldn't be Shadowrun, would it?

Well, there still would be the Vampire cyber zombies with silverguns.

[Snow_Fox]

I can certainly see some guys IQ rising dramatically if their dick had an off-switch. Including me (IMG:style_emoticons/default/frown.gif)

That I like.

[Xahn Borealis]

And Bubba.

[Udoshi]

I always find it weird how everyone here's always so blasé about Bunrakus.

I would partly blame Neuromancer(Is there anyone who HASN'T read it?) for this one , and its semi-okay description of it as 'Free Money'. You show up for work, clock in, turn the memory editor equivalent on, and wake up a bit sore some hours later, take your check, and go home. Which sounds kind of reasonable, if squicky. There's some level of respect for the employees, and I think that impression has stuck in peoples minds. Molly millions is sort of an edge case, in which she was using said money to pay for razorgirl ware which ended up causing glitches and incompatabilities, her manager found out and exploited it as viciously and profitably as he could.

The problem is that in shadowrun, that kind of exploitation is the norm, not the exception - especially when nasty crap like drugs and human trafficking get involved. When you stop to think about whats actually going on its kind of horrifying.

Personally, I'm kind of surprised this thread has reached three pages. I might as well share one of our groups funny moments discussing the implants.

It started with a fairly innocent question. "How much Capacity does a penile implant have?". "Compare its size to a cyberlimb and go from there?" "...."
Things went downhill when people started making hidden weapon jokes about monowhips, cracks about electronic warfare 'packages' and suggestions about an AI Fixer renting processing space on one - it might have been a commlink in one since its the same size, but I don't rightly recall - said AI's handle being Mr. Johnson, of course.

I swear that implant is the best damned troll in the entire edition.

[Yerameyahu]

Honestly, I'm not too sure about the pleasure-related options. BTLs more than cover that already, and they're more convenient than ever (with wireless distribution and no need for a chipjack).

[Ascalaphus]

There's a.. relation between penile implants and BTL. Penile implants are useless without the tactile sensors; there's pressure on the manufacturers to go a bit beyond regulations on those sensors...

Is it me, or is any guy who'd take a penile implant just Messed Up ™?

[Yerameyahu]

I really feel like it's a prosthetic, because of the *replacement* aspect. Like, he *got* messed up, so he needs a replacement. Because it just seems like BTLs already win for the pleasure side. Obviously there are reasons to 'upgrade' yourself, so I'm only referring to the sort of alternative sexuality ideas being batted around. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) I'm saying that it doesn't seem like you'd get one *just* to feel more.

[Glyph]

It's less a mere upgrade to the sensation you feel, and more the prospect of being in total control of your own sexuality. To be able to go all night long, or, alternately, to be able to turn it off, and resist any attempts to manipulate you with your libido, at will.

[Yerameyahu]

Yes, but then, no. I don't think that turning it off is the same as turning off your libido or your sexuality, not at all.

[Xahn Borealis]

Neuromancer(Is there anyone who HASN'T read it?)

Ermmmmm.... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/frown.gif)

[Sengir]

When my girlfriend read Augmentation, she was upset that while there was a penile implant, there was nothing for the ladies. She suggested something that changes flavors, like at a malt shop. Half my group, the girls, then spent the next half hour talking about various vaginal implant cyberware options while the boys looked embarrassed.
It would have been hilarious had it not brought the game to a halt.

And once again, the German errata wins - we have vaginal implants. And the concept of using synthetic muscles has been good for some nasty ideas (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

[Mardrax]

I really feel like it's a prosthetic, because of the *replacement* aspect. Like, he *got* messed up, so he needs a replacement. Because it just seems like BTLs already win for the pleasure side. Obviously there are reasons to 'upgrade' yourself, so I'm only referring to the sort of alternative sexuality ideas being batted around. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/smile.gif) I'm saying that it doesn't seem like you'd get one *just* to feel more.

It's a fix for things like erectile dysfunction, which will be an increasing problem with the increased lifespan and virility of the better-to-dos in the Sixth World. It's also a vast improvement over masculinising genoplasty for those who would be so inclined.

And once again, the German errata wins - we have vaginal implants. And the concept of using synthetic muscles has been good for some nasty ideas (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)

This, a cyberhand, and an internal speaker.
Redifining 'talk to the hand.'

[Yerameyahu]

Psh, Sengir. The existing entry for Penile Implant already says that the vaginal version is an option. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)

[Xahn Borealis]

It's like someone stuck a vibrator in a fleshlight. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/grinbig.gif)

[Sengir]

Psh, Sengir. The existing entry for Penile Implant already says that the vaginal version is an option. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)

At least in my version it only talks about giving a biologically female customer a penile implant, but not implanting an artificial vagina.

And the idea was more about a hooker using her cybered PC muscle as a blackmail device - either pay something extra, or it's gonna be really tight...

[Yerameyahu]

Ah, it does say transgendered.

[Udoshi]

Ermmmmm.... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/frown.gif)

Oh, go google up a .rarpeg ebook of it already. The sprawl trilogy is worth reading.