Coming to America. (Shen's bl0g) Options

[emo samurai]

I like to people-watch. Sometimes I project into a crowd of people, seeing the faces they make when the laughs quiet and everyone turns back to their beers. Sometimes I like to have a clearer view of things and sit in the corner of the bar while invisible or disguised as just another gutter-rat, watching bemusedly the lively anarchy you all are so fond of. And sometimes I just sit in plain sight and look.

Why do I do it? It's not money; I never tell anyone what I see or even that I do this. Why do I do this?

Sure, there's morbid curiosity; people like to watch other people die, even when they hate their lives, but that's not it. There's self-interest, but I have no interest in using you people. It destroys the aesthetic distance, you see. There's voyeurism, but really, where you eat, drink, shower, and piss is not nearly so interesting as what I can see in your eyes when the lights die down. I just want to know, to see between the fine cracks in your facades that nobody can see until no-one's looking. No one but me.

So bluster all you want; wave your gun, drink your beers, have your little fights over who disrespected who. Sure, you fool some people, hell, you may fool everybody. But you don't fool me.

--Shen