 Laughs in the Shadows, Jokes with a Shadowrun twist |
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 Apr 19 2007, 09:05 PM
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#351
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Neophyte Runner  Group: Members Posts: 2,174 Joined: 13-May 04 From: UCAS Member No.: 6,327  |
Or a headdesk/slapping one's forehead kind of smiley. |
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 Apr 19 2007, 09:25 PM
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#352
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 546 Joined: 26-February 02 From: Manchester, England Member No.: 1,062 |
:please: or :dead: not enough? Maybe :notworthy:
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Apr 19 2007, 09:28 PM
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#353
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Manus Celer Dei Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 17,008 Joined: 30-December 02 From: Boston Member No.: 3,802 |
:dead: is it. :please: carries a more confrontational tone ("that was just stupid"), while :notworthy: is entirely positive.
~J |
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Apr 19 2007, 09:33 PM
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#354
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Neophyte Runner Group: Members Posts: 2,174 Joined: 13-May 04 From: UCAS Member No.: 6,327 |
But you can never have enough smileys... ;-)
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Apr 19 2007, 09:40 PM
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#355
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Manus Celer Dei Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 17,008 Joined: 30-December 02 From: Boston Member No.: 3,802 |
:proof:
~J |
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Apr 19 2007, 10:03 PM
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#356
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,066 Joined: 5-February 03 Member No.: 4,017 |
Not a proof that you can never have enough smileys, but that you only had that one to use to demand proof is proof that we do not have enough. |
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Apr 19 2007, 10:09 PM
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#357
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Neophyte Runner Group: Members Posts: 2,174 Joined: 13-May 04 From: UCAS Member No.: 6,327 |
And since we can't respond back to your demand for proof with a smiley is proof enough.
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Apr 19 2007, 10:56 PM
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#358
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Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
A strong young ork at the construction site was bragging that he could outdo anyone in a feat of strength. He made a special case of making fun of Morris, one of the dwarf workmen. After several months, Morris had enough.
"Why don't you put your money where your mouth is?" he said. "I will bet a week's wages that I can haul something in a wheelbarrow over to that outbuilding that you won't be able to wheel back." "You're on, halfer," the braggart replied. "It's a bet! Let's see what you got." Morris reached out and grabbed the wheelbarrow by the handles. Then, nodding to the ork, he said, "All right. Get in." |
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Apr 20 2007, 02:33 AM
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#359
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Street Doc Group: Admin Posts: 3,508 Joined: 2-March 04 From: Neverwhere Member No.: 6,114 |
Did you hear about the new triad cook book? 101 ways to wok your dog...
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Apr 20 2007, 05:18 AM
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#360
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Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
Okay, this is more general gaming humor, but it's still too funny not to post.
Bizarro, April 20, 2007 |
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Apr 20 2007, 06:30 PM
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#361
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Neophyte Runner Group: Members Posts: 2,174 Joined: 13-May 04 From: UCAS Member No.: 6,327 |
Heh, good one. That was printed today in the Washington Post Express also.
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Apr 22 2007, 11:29 PM
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#362
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Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
No One expects the Rules Revision
Scene: A gaming table. GM: There are seven Lone Star officers firing at you! PC1: How could they firing first? I have high initiative! GM: It doesn't help. PC1: Yes it does! GM: No it doesn't! PC1: Yes it does! With the new rules changes in 4th edition, it does. GM: Blimey, I didn't expect some kind of Shadowrun rules revision! CRASH! Crashing chord! FanPro burst in, screeching. Rob Boyle: NOBODY expects the Shadowrun rules revision! Our chief change is the game mechanic. And the Matrix. Our TWO chief changes are the game mechanic and the Matrix and the way character creation works. Arg! Our three chief changes are the game mechanic, the Matrix, character creation and the dice pools I'LL COME IN AGAIN! FanPro runs out. GM: Err...Blimey, I didn't expect some kind of Shadowrun rules revision. CRASH! Rob: Noooooooooooobody expects the Shadowrun rules revision! Amongst our chief changes are such diverse elements as the Matrix, the game mechanic, character creation and dice pools and character stats and oh God. Cardinal Dancey, you'll have to do it. Dancey: What? Rob: You'll have to say "our chief changes are..." Dancey: I couldn't do that. Rob: Shut up! We'll come in again! GM: I did not expect some kind of Shadowrun rules revision. CRASH! Dancey: Ah! Ah. Nobody.... Rob: Expects... Dancey: Yes, nobody expects the Shadowrun rules revision. In fact, those who do expect it - Rob: Our chief changes are.... Dancey: Ah, our chief changes are, um, the Matrix and Rob: STOP! That's it! Our chief change is the game mechanic! Dancey: What about the Matrix? Rob: Oh yes, and the Matrix. Dancey: And - Rob: SHUT UP! Now, we find your game lacking on three counts: lacking in dice, lacking in miniatures, lacking in stats and lacking in rules - four, FOUR counts. But you have one last chance! Reject the ways of dicelessness, renounce your house - two, TWO last chances. You have two last chances. Reject the ways of dicelessness, renounce your house rules, return to the fold of 4th ed- THREE last chances, you have THREE LAST CHANCES - and you shall go free. Now...how do you plead? GM: We're innocent! Rob: HA! Cardinal Monty! Fetch....the Mountain Dew!!! CRASHING CHORD! I'll let you imagine the rest.... ~*~ Let it be noted that I nothing but the utmost respect for Rob and the rest of the Shadowrun producers--it's just that I saw this as a parody for the cancer-causing game on another site and I couldn't resist adapting it to Shadowrun... (so, yes, it is a parody of a parody of a sketch of surreal British humor) |
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Apr 23 2007, 12:21 AM
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#363
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Uncle Fisty Group: Admin Posts: 13,891 Joined: 3-January 05 From: Next To Her Member No.: 6,928 |
heehee... [Puss N Boots]Makes me laugh.[/Puss N boots]
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Apr 23 2007, 08:47 PM
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#364
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Bushido Cowgirl Group: Members Posts: 5,782 Joined: 8-July 05 From: On the Double K Ranch a half day's ride out of Phlogiston Flats Member No.: 7,490 |
... :rotfl:
...now that was a nice bit... [man seated at desk]...no it wasn't... ...it most certainly was... [man seated at desk]...no it wasn't... ...Excuse me, All I get here are contradictions. I was looking for House Ruling... [man seated at desk] Oh, I'm very sorry, this is Rules Lawyering, House Ruling is down the hall, third door to the left.... Thank you, Sorry for the mixup... [man seated at desk]...no your not... ...yes I am... [Constable from the Game Police steps in] OK, Stop that! Stop That!, Right, now off with you then. And you, stop reading this! ...it's a fair cop.... [Man seated at Desk] (no it isn't...) [20 tonne D6 drops on all three from above] |
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Apr 25 2007, 03:37 PM
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#365
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Target Group: Members Posts: 91 Joined: 19-January 03 From: Near Boston Mass. Member No.: 3,927 |
Theres a webcomic that just posted a bit on Shadowrun.
Weregeek This is the current issue. I don't know if they are going to follow this up or not. But like he says.....cool. |
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Apr 25 2007, 03:53 PM
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#366
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 181 Joined: 29-March 07 Member No.: 11,342 |
Four orc gangers tries to bully an elven street sam and his human decker friend and get a few nuyens.
For some reason, the players are unarmed, but the sam tries to intimidate them and so tells me (the GM). I put my hands in my coat's pocket, pointing my fingers in it to pretend i have a gun in it and tell them : "And with that would you want to negociate ?" clearly looking at my fingers. I roll a perception test for each : failed, failed, failed, botch ! So i reply : "Watch out guys ! he's having an erection !" ... |
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 Apr 27 2007, 06:56 PM
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#367
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Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
Governor Strouthers, tired and fed up with Lone Star's apparent ineptitude in controlling crime, decides to hold a test for the various police corps that want the job. He releases a rabbit into a nearby forest and each of them has to catch it.
Eagle Security goes in first. They place animal and spirit informants throughout the forest. They question all plant, mineral and nature spirit witnesses. After three months of extensive investigations they conclude that rabbits do not exist. Then Knight Errant goes in. After two weeks with no leads they burn the forest, killing everything in it, including the rabbit, and they make no apologies. The rabbit had it coming. Then Lone Star goes in. They come out two hours later with a badly beaten bear. The bear is yelling: "Okay! Okay! I'm a rabbit! I'm a rabbit!" |
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Apr 27 2007, 07:04 PM
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#368
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Ain Soph Aur Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 3,477 Joined: 26-February 02 From: Montreal, Canada Member No.: 600 |
HAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAAHHAAHAHHAHAAH
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Apr 27 2007, 07:36 PM
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#369
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Bushido Cowgirl Group: Members Posts: 5,782 Joined: 8-July 05 From: On the Double K Ranch a half day's ride out of Phlogiston Flats Member No.: 7,490 |
...ditto :D |
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Apr 27 2007, 08:30 PM
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#370
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Uncle Fisty Group: Admin Posts: 13,891 Joined: 3-January 05 From: Next To Her Member No.: 6,928 |
bibliophile, you would so get karma if you were in my game!
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Apr 28 2007, 01:09 AM
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#371
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Bushido Cowgirl Group: Members Posts: 5,782 Joined: 8-July 05 From: On the Double K Ranch a half day's ride out of Phlogiston Flats Member No.: 7,490 |
...same in mine...
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Apr 28 2007, 01:37 AM
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#372
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Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
Oooh. hmmm... so can I take a rain check on those karma offers for if and when I decide to join one of your forum games in the future?
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Apr 28 2007, 01:58 AM
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#373
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Uncle Fisty Group: Admin Posts: 13,891 Joined: 3-January 05 From: Next To Her Member No.: 6,928 |
sure thing :D
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Apr 28 2007, 02:03 AM
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#374
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Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
And, although my last joke is going to be hard to top, I have this one to offer...
A young hacker from the streets joins a shadowrunner team, which was lead by a very legendary and powerful adept, who had been running the shadows for years. His entire team looked up to this man, veteran of hundreds of runs, with something that bordered on outright reverence. But the young hacker noticed something odd about his new leader and, after several runs, he got up the courage to ask the veteran adept, "Sir, why do you always wear that red shirt when we go on runs? It's rather..." "Conspicuous? Yes, but it serves a purpose." "Which is...?" "Well, if I am wounded in combat, the blood won't show up against the red shirt, which keeps you and the others from losing heart midway through the fight." The young hacker thinks on this for a moment and nods. Several weeks later, the team of shadowrunners are engaged in a run on a Renraku facility when suddenly klaxons begin to wail and the hacker intercepts deployment orders for over two dozen Red Samurai, all of them converging on their position. He pipes the feeds over to the rest of the group and tries to pinpoint the locations of the Red Samurai, while trying to spoof the system at the same time. He could have sworn, though, that he heard his leader say under his breath, "well... at least I wore my brown pants..." |
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Apr 28 2007, 02:56 AM
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#375
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 433 Joined: 26-February 02 From: Somewhere in Iraq Member No.: 1,789 |
So is releasing one's bowels a Free Action or Simple Action?
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Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: 26th February 2025 - 11:01 PM |
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