 The New CLUE Files, Who remembers... |
  |
 Feb 16 2007, 09:56 PM
Post
#1
|
|
|
Shadow Cartographer  Group: Members Posts: 3,737 Joined: 2-June 06 From: Secret Tunnels under the UK (South West) Member No.: 8,636  |
Once upon a time, there was a place where all of our role-playing shame could be exposed for the World to see. When you got all the way into the enemy base and found you'd forgotten to bring the explosives, it was there. When you decided to climb up fifteen stories of empty lift shaft for no reason at all, it was there. When the mage decided to challenge the elf in the silly makeup to a spell duel... it was there.
These were the CLUE files where GMs and players posted each other's humiliating misadventures. They're still out there, but they haven't been updated or maintained in many a year. It is my proposal, for the educational benefit of neophyte runners everywhere, to re-instate the CLUE files. I want your stories and anecdotes (preferably Shadowrun) of player or GM stupidity or simple unawareness. This species being what it is, I know there must be a goldmine out there. What I would ask, is that people email me their stories through the link in my profile so that I can post a big bunch on the site for an unveiling. Doesn't have to be that way, but I thought it would be nice. I'll post back here with a link when I have a dozen, say. Comments? Thoughts? (But stories by email, preferably). Thanks, -Khadim. EDIT: I'm just doing the page layout and whatnot now. It's going to look lovely. :) |
 |
 
|
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:03 PM
Post
#2
|
|
|
Manus Celer Dei Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 17,012 Joined: 30-December 02 From: Boston Member No.: 3,802 |
Once, a player forgot to say his character was wearing pants to a meet, so I had the Johnson walk out and the cops arrest and shoot him.
~J |
|
|
|
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:06 PM
Post
#3
|
|
|
Shadow Cartographer Group: Members Posts: 3,737 Joined: 2-June 06 From: Secret Tunnels under the UK (South West) Member No.: 8,636 |
I can only assume that you remove all sharp objects from the room before you begin running each session.
Seriously though, if anyone has any good stories, then please email me through my profile. Can PM it to me if you want, I'm just concerned for the capacity of my forum mailbox. |
|
|
|
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:11 PM
Post
#4
|
|
|
Shooting Target Group: Members Posts: 1,629 Joined: 14-December 06 Member No.: 10,361 |
Are you sure you're not stealing the original girl... uh... whatever-her-name-was's idea?
|
|
|
|
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:13 PM
Post
#5
|
|||
|
Genuine Artificial Intelligence Group: Members Posts: 4,019 Joined: 12-June 03 Member No.: 4,715 |
HA! It's true, though. Most of the CLUE files were some GM saying "look my players are stupid n00bs!" when really it's just an asshat GM. Any "look how stupid so-and-so is" type of post usually ends in people questioning every little detail, moves on to arguing, and eventually degenerates into name-calling and flames. Good luck, though. ;) Seriously, I wish you well, and they're sometimes a lot of fun to read. Just be warned that it may turn into more of a compilation of bad GMing than anything else. Then again, that still serves a purpose, if not the originally intended one. |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:34 PM
Post
#6
|
|||
|
Shadow Cartographer Group: Members Posts: 3,737 Joined: 2-June 06 From: Secret Tunnels under the UK (South West) Member No.: 8,636 |
I hope it's not stealing. I read through the CLUE files long ago and there was some funny stuff in there. But it seems to be long defunct. If the original wants to start up again then more power to it, but I hope the one who started it wouldn't mind it resurfacing once more. I'd be interested in hearing from her if she's still around. And as to Moon-Hawk's comment. Yes - there's a bit of GM ass-hattery involved in some of this. I'm more than looking forward to any examples of the GM falling flat on his face, too. Maybe if I get enough of that sort then I'll call it something else and we'll change the theme of it slightly. But there's definitely value in having a compilation of people's funny Shadowrun stories. And proving that I'm really not very awake at the moment, I completely missed Kagetenshi's eloquently put point and had just assumed he was drunk whilst posting. Sorry - good point. I will be trying to put just the best stuff up there rather than GM ego-stroking. I have one submission emailed to me so far. I'd like some more. :) |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:42 PM
Post
#7
|
|
|
Horror Group: Members Posts: 5,322 Joined: 15-June 05 From: BumFuck, New Jersey Member No.: 7,445 |
May I make a suggestion?
Make the N.O.C.L.U.E. (New Operating C.L.U.E.) files in a Blog format. That way people can comment on the stories, and those involved may anonamously speak for themselves without fear of ridicule (on other names.) |
|
|
|
|
Feb 16 2007, 10:42 PM
Post
#8
|
|||
|
Old Man Jones Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 4,415 Joined: 26-February 02 From: New York Member No.: 1,699 |
I'd suggest a proviso that submissions must be about players setting themselves up to be embarrassed/fail/die horribly, rather than merely players being screwed over by a mean GM? Any competent GM can kill characters. It takes a really good GM to make them kill themselves! -karma |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 16 2007, 11:24 PM
Post
#9
|
|||
|
Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,066 Joined: 5-February 03 Member No.: 4,017 |
Ah, the joys of selective memory then. I only seem to cling to such wonders as using a cutting torch from the inside of an oil pipe that still has a non-trivial amount of combustables. Or the one where of the three PCs, one starts an open fire assault before the other one is in position for a sneaky entry and the third is down on the street cackling "I am death!" at everyone he sees. |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 16 2007, 11:44 PM
Post
#10
|
|
|
Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 152 Joined: 11-May 06 Member No.: 8,547 |
If my group made the clue files once, it can do it again. Heck, I'm sure we could recycle some of our old adventures and give you months of material.
|
|
|
|
|
Feb 17 2007, 12:19 AM
Post
#11
|
|||||
|
Creating a god with his own hands Group: Members Posts: 1,405 Joined: 30-September 02 From: 0:0:0:0:0:0:0:1 Member No.: 3,364 |
you got an example there? most of the files I remember were pretty freakin retarded. |
||||
|
|
|
||||
|
Feb 17 2007, 01:06 AM
Post
#12
|
|
|
Manus Celer Dei Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 17,012 Joined: 30-December 02 From: Boston Member No.: 3,802 |
A bad example, but in this file, while there is some player stupidity, the GM conjures a Lone Star van out of the very air itself to compound the problem. Even with the ridiculous canon response times, they can't have gotten there before the character could read the nametag.
The obvious case of GM dickery that I remember is this one, where apparently the GM thinks that a pair of professional criminals, probably with high Intelligence scores, can't remember that they can't see in the dark. That's the one that I look to as my example when I do things like what I posted above. Well, ok, I don't actually do those things, but that's what I think about when I get angry about "hurr hurr, my players so stupid". Which isn't necessarily what every player-action-criticism is about, of course, but far too many are. ~J |
|
|
|
|
Feb 17 2007, 01:10 AM
Post
#13
|
|
|
Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,066 Joined: 5-February 03 Member No.: 4,017 |
You are aware that the link in the first one does not have any surprise Lone Star vans, but does have two mormons getting shotgun blasts to the gut provided by some paranoid runners?
The second is an actual case of nit-picking the item lists. I suggest this as a good pair though. |
|
|
|
|
Feb 17 2007, 01:25 AM
Post
#14
|
|||||
|
Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,206 Joined: 9-July 06 From: Fresno, CA Member No.: 8,856 |
I think it went something like, Guy hits the panic button and step out shoots the two guys, and look there's the STAR. |
||||
|
|
|
||||
|
Feb 17 2007, 11:11 AM
Post
#15
|
|||
|
Shadow Cartographer Group: Members Posts: 3,737 Joined: 2-June 06 From: Secret Tunnels under the UK (South West) Member No.: 8,636 |
Then please, please do! I don't think I can launch this site until I get some more submissions. One or two from your group would be a great help! I have the site done now and I'm just waiting for material. @ShadowDragon8685: I might consider doing it in a BLOG format. The idea of just emailing them was that I could edit and format them along with weeding out any posts along the lines of "...then my character stuck a bomb up his anus. Hurr hurr." But I will consider it depending on how it goes. Thanks. -K. |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 17 2007, 05:36 PM
Post
#16
|
|||||
|
ghostrider Group: Retired Admins Posts: 4,196 Joined: 16-May 04 Member No.: 6,333 |
Or you could just put up the disclaimer:
Every time CLUE comes up, it turns into a few people soapboxing and giving out unsolicited advice, which nearly always turns into an argument/flamewar. I've never understood why people think "hey, check this funny story out" translates to "please share your infinite wisdom with me". (Not a mod post, just me commenting, blah blah blah disclaimer.) |
||||
|
|
|
||||
|
Feb 17 2007, 08:41 PM
Post
#17
|
|||
|
Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,066 Joined: 5-February 03 Member No.: 4,017 |
Because some people think "hello" translates to "please share your infinite wisdom with me". |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 17 2007, 08:42 PM
Post
#18
|
|
|
Manus Celer Dei Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 17,012 Joined: 30-December 02 From: Boston Member No.: 3,802 |
If you breathe, you are asking for my infinite wisdom. If you don't breathe, I provide my infinite wisdom without having to be asked (the first part of which is usually "breathe").
~J |
|
|
|
|
Feb 25 2007, 07:55 PM
Post
#19
|
|
|
Incertum est quo loco te mors expectet; Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 6,548 Joined: 24-October 03 From: DeeCee, U.S. Member No.: 5,760 |
As a note, the original creator of the CLUE files has asked that they not fall under new management. So far people have interpreted that as meaning, while they can make a new site with the same idea, they shouldn't reuse any of the stories (unless resubmitted) and shouldn't use the name. You may want to consider using a different name. The last effort called them the SLEUTH files.
|
|
|
|
|
Feb 25 2007, 09:28 PM
Post
#20
|
|||
|
Shadow Cartographer Group: Members Posts: 3,737 Joined: 2-June 06 From: Secret Tunnels under the UK (South West) Member No.: 8,636 |
Can you put me in touch with her? I'll rename the project if that is the case. I did try to contact her previously but the email address on the original CLUE site bounced back. I haven't copied any material from the original site (either stories, introductions or layout). As it is, the response has been so little, that it'll take years before I can actually launch it (thank you to both people who took the time to send me something). -K. |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 25 2007, 10:47 PM
Post
#21
|
|
|
Great Dragon Group: Members Posts: 6,640 Joined: 6-June 04 Member No.: 6,383 |
Well, I have a bunch of stories. I gave 'em to the SLEUTH guy but he never put them up.
How many do you need? I can add a few about bad GMing, as well, since the first couple of years of Shadowrun I played were with a killer GM who killed my characters on average every 2 sessions. We didn't play a whole lot since we were in high school using free periods, but there's still a bunch of bad GM stories there. I suppose that how funny they are depends on the telling. Also, just to make everyone dislike me, I am an advocate of, "if it's not on your list it's not with you!", so I would have done the dark tunnel thing. |
|
|
|
 Feb 25 2007, 11:55 PM
Post
#22
|
|
|
Running Target Group: Members Posts: 1,180 Joined: 22-January 07 From: Rochester, NY Member No.: 10,737 |
While we're on the topic of fun/nutty/crazy player antics, I present this bundle of hilarity:
975 Things Mr. Welch can no longer do during an RPG :rotfl: :grinbig: :D |
|
|
|
|
Feb 26 2007, 01:00 AM
Post
#23
|
|||
|
Incertum est quo loco te mors expectet; Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 6,548 Joined: 24-October 03 From: DeeCee, U.S. Member No.: 5,760 |
No, she seems to have largely fallen off the face of the earth. But one of her last posts indicated that she's not going to hand over the reins, so since then, everyone has named their version of the CLUE files something else. I just wanted to give you the head's up, she's unlikely to pursue the matter if you stick with the current name. I do have a story to write to you, but I'm not going to write it right now, too tired to do a good job. You should get in touch with the Sleuth people and collaborate with them. Search the forum, I'm sure you'll find the thread. |
||
|
|
|
||
 Feb 26 2007, 06:27 PM
Post
#24
|
|||
|
Shadow Cartographer Group: Members Posts: 3,737 Joined: 2-June 06 From: Secret Tunnels under the UK (South West) Member No.: 8,636 |
All of them. And by all means give me as much detail as you like. Seriously, I think this will be great and the more the better. I need to get about ten decent stories together, I think, to launch the site properly (any less and I wont get the traffic to drive interest to contribute more). And once I pass that, I was thinking I'd add them as quickly as I got them one by one, or else slow it down to one a week if I got a lot. As it looks like I might be renaming the site, bad GM stories can probably be worked in, so long as they're based on the characters of the GM / GM's world rather than GM's ignorance of rules, etc. I think for the this needs to be about in game events rather than participants themselves, whether they're players or GMs. @Nezumi: I'll be looking forward to your story. Thanks, -K. |
||
|
|
|
||
|
Feb 26 2007, 08:44 PM
Post
#25
|
|
|
Shooting Target Group: Members Posts: 1,532 Joined: 26-February 02 From: Calgary, Canada Member No.: 769 |
Years ago back wen we were still playing 2nd ed I was running my group through the old adventure Dark Angel. It was my first crack at GMing and so far things had been going fairly smooth, at least as smoothly as any games where every participant was 15 years old and had spent the past 4 hours drinking bottle after bottle of pepsi.
Dramatis Personae: Tinman: a human streetsam who due to a misinterpretation of the rules had his entire body replaced by cyber and still had positive essence. Elfin-Face: A troll street sam DMPC mostly along to hit things and not talk. Archangel: A human(?) decker Shaman (who's name I forget): an elf wolf shaman. Anyhow, the climatic scene in Dark Angel involves the team assaulting a yacht some distance off the coast attempting to rescue a kidnapped rockstar. The waters surrounding the yacht were chock full of some kind of nasty sharks I can't remember if they were cybered or magically bound or what but either way they would attack anyone who ended up in the water. The team approached the boat in a rubber zodiac when they felt something bump the side of the dingy. So far they had been remarkably good in their approach using a water spirit to push the boat rather than using the engine and had managed to make it about 50 meters out without being noticed. Unfortunately that little bump was to set in motion a bout of cluelessness that still gets talked about. Archangel: "Something bumped us? I lean over the side of the boat to see what it is." Me: "Ok, I'm going to need a TN 3 agility roll from everyone as the boat gets banged harder a second time, Archangel, you need to make TN 5 since you're hanging over the edge." Archangel: "Uhh... I got no successes..." Me: "Er, ok... as the boat rocks you loose your grip on the edge and tumble head first into the water... I'm gonna need a swim roll... modified by... you're wearing light security armour arn't you? that's something like 50 pounds?" Archangel: "But I can't swim..." Me: "Ok, then... the rest of you hear Archangel cry out in surprise as he tumbles over the edge and then hear frantic splashing as he flails about in the water. You also think you hear some confused sounding shouts coming from the direction of the yacht. Oh, and Archangel, something bits your leg trying to pull you under water, it really hurts, Resist 8M." Tinman: "I start reaching over the edge trying to pull Archangel back in." Me: "Ok Elfin-Face joins you. You see..." Shaman dude: "Uhhh I pull out my flare gun and shoot off a flare" Everyone: "WHAT?" Shaman: "Yeah, we need to find him in the dark, I pull out my flare gun and shoot a flare" Me: "Ok since both Tinman and Elfin-Face are busy trying to pull Archangel out of the water no one notices until they hear the Bang!-HISSS of the flare being shot... Sure enough you see Archangel struggling with a 5 or 6 foot long shark and definitely coming off the looser, but you manage to grab the collar of his armour and drag him back into the boat. The flare didn't help much though, since EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU except Archangel has at least some kind of low light vision... Unfortunately you also seem to have drawn the attention of the guards on the yacht. You hear the distinctive sound of automatic fire as tracers start tearing into your RUBBER dingy. In the end because I didn't want a TPK I swapped the HMG for an LMG and fudged some rolls to let them make it to the yacht before the dingy sunk though they had at least one serious and 2 moderate wounds between them by the time they made it there. The long drawn out battle for control of the yacht with now alerted crew saw Tinman soaking overdamage, the Shaman get killed, and Elfin Face 1 box shy of a deadly wound. The runs entire profit was spent at the hospital. |
|
|
|
|
|
Lo-Fi Version | Time is now: 26th July 2025 - 01:31 PM |
Topps, Inc has sole ownership of the names, logo, artwork, marks, photographs, sounds, audio, video and/or any proprietary material used in connection with the game Shadowrun. Topps, Inc has granted permission to the Dumpshock Forums to use such names, logos, artwork, marks and/or any proprietary materials for promotional and informational purposes on its website but does not endorse, and is not affiliated with the Dumpshock Forums in any official capacity whatsoever.