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> "Artifact" Silly Time!
Hartbaine
post Sep 25 2007, 02:30 AM
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Okay, a fun game we can all play. It's simple, all you have to do is steal an item from some other source that you would never actually consider putting into Shadowrun but the idea of it makes you chuckle.

the only rules are:

1. You cannot make the item up yourself, you must 'steal' it from movies, video games, fiction, etc.

2. You have to state the source, so we all know you didn't just make it up.

Let's see how long this list can get. :D

I'll go first.

Boss's Bandana (Metal Gear Solid, Video Game))
Effect- Runners never run out of ammo while it's worn.

Bourne's Identity (The Bourne Identity, Movie)
Effect- While in possession of Bourne's Identity you kick ass. All Active Combat Skills are raised to 7 but you gain the permanent flaw 'Amnesia' and 'Hunted'. Not that it matters, you'll win. Every time.

Kyoto Kid's Keyboard (Dumpshock, Forum)
Effect- You gain Matrix Ettiquette 7 and and a great Street Cred boost but will not be able to go through any conversation without name dropping one or more of your alter egos.

(I know, the last one breaks the rules, but I couldn't help it.)
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Zhan Shi
post Sep 25 2007, 03:48 AM
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There are a number of things from a number of sources. None make me chuckle, however. They're just lame. As an example, take the "Nowhere Man" tv show from the mid 90's. An all-powerful, far reaching conspiracy can steal a man's entire life in LITERALY five minutes, even going so far as to change the locks on his house, replace his dog, and wipe all memory of him from all his closest associates. They can do whatever they want, whenever they want, to whomever they want. But they can't get a damn photo negative. Bleh.
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Fortune
post Sep 25 2007, 04:40 AM
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QUOTE (Hartbaine)
Kyoto Kid's Keyboard (Dumpshock, Forum)
Effect- You gain Matrix Ettiquette 7 and and a great Street Cred boost but will not be able to go through any conversation without name dropping one or more of your alter egos.

Classic! :D :notworthy:
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Method
post Sep 25 2007, 04:44 AM
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The Case (Ronin, Movie)

Effect- so long as the case remains unopened your character has all Active Social Skills at a 7 (especially Con), can drive any car with all the bonuses of a HotSim VR rigger and gains the Knowledge Skill "Everything there is to know about espionage except what color is the boat house at Hereford".

If the case is ever opened, the game world implodes. Generate new game world.
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Trigger
post Sep 25 2007, 05:16 AM
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The BFG (Doom, etc.)

Effect. Instant death against any creature without rolling an attack roll with the gun. Instead the target must Roll Reaction + Dodge/ Gymnastics (3) to avoid instant death, with every hit over the threshold reducing the Damage from 16 downwards before the target rolls soak.
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It trolls!
post Sep 25 2007, 05:25 AM
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OK, let me try:

Chow Yun Fat's Beretta (Hard Boiled, A better Tomorrow, The Replacement Killers...)
Light Pistol, 5P, Semiautomatic, Ammo: 15(clip)
Refills it's clip every combat turn only to be miraculously empty when your archvillain's gun is empty too.

The Rock of Shame (The Simpsons)
Yeah, if you thought dragging this naked through Springfield was hard, just imagine dragging this naked through the Redmond Barrens...
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ludomastro
post Sep 25 2007, 05:27 AM
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The Matrix (Transformers - Various eras)

The runner gains the title "Prime" and get his own theme music in addition to 7's in all physical attributes as well as all combat skills.
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bibliophile20
post Sep 25 2007, 06:39 AM
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Hmmm...

MJOLNIR battle armor (Halo)
The runner gains Skill Group: Firearms 7 and Skill Group: Close Combat 7, as well as a built-in A.I. that runs tactical functions, but his face cannot be seen.

A compass that doesn't point North (Pirates of the Caribbean)
The runner has a mystical artifact that points towards the runner's greatest desire; note that focusing on said greatest desire is required.
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Big D
post Sep 25 2007, 06:55 AM
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Ribbon (any FF)
Grants INW 20.

Indy's Hat (Henry Jones, Jr.)
Grants Exotic Weapon (monowhip) +6, CHA+2, Major Phobia (snakes)
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DTFarstar
post Sep 25 2007, 06:59 AM
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Sword of Legion(VtM) : Sword inhabited by the demon Legion Jesus faced down in the bible, for every person killed by the sword, the legion gains a member and the swords power increases.

Effectively a weapon focus that gains another force rating every person you kill with it.

Beam Sword(Halo 2) : Automatically fills half a persons physical damage track in one swing. If instead the attacker is charging, then it fills the full physical track instead.

Pistol(Halo) : No penalty for called shots, 3-5 shots in the head and neck area kill everyone regardless of armor.

Chris
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It trolls!
post Sep 25 2007, 07:08 AM
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Got another one:

The Navigator's head (Monkey Island) ...WITH A FRICKIN' CONTROL RIG
Counts as a rating 7 Pilot as well as Clearsight, Maneuver and Defense autosoft in any vehicle it is plugged into. Also sometimes utters witty comments.
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Zolhex
post Sep 25 2007, 07:47 AM
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Kimunnicator (Kim Possible)

Connects you to Wade the super Technomancer/Hacker (players preferance)
Wade all his computer/matrix related skills are 7's
Wade all his computer/matrix related attributes are 7's
Wade all his computer/matrix related programs/complex forms are 7's
Wade all his computer/matrix related agents/sprites are 7's

Also for some reason running exssive applications doesn't hinder his commlink/connection so on and so fourth.
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Zolhex
post Sep 25 2007, 08:03 AM
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The O'Neil Idol (Stargate SG-1, Atlantis, Continuum)

Any character that can successfully make jokes during times of almost certian death will never die.

What is required:
Use catch phrases like "Yeah sure ya betcha" and "D'OH"
Drop referances to the Wizard of Oz
Make general comments and quips that are funny
Lastly must be the one in charge of a 4 person team which must have at least one Brainiac type, one must be female and one total warrior type.
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Kronk2
post Sep 25 2007, 10:21 AM
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Rincewinds luggage. ( Diskworld. Books by Terry Practchett)

its a 32 legged walking sea chest that is the portal to the dimension of stored space. I has been known to swallow people and store them forever. It does sometimes wander off, but has the uncanny ability to be there right when you need i, but never exactly when you want it.
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Slump
post Sep 25 2007, 10:55 AM
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Some Random Guys Cellphone/PDA (Die Hard 4)

This thing does it all, you can change what frequencies and communications protocols it uses with just a few key presses, and hack government supercomputers with ease, not to mention deliver a 'spam-bomb' without internet access.
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ixombie
post Sep 25 2007, 11:08 AM
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My turn to be retarded: The Elder Wand (a.k.a the Deathstick, the Wand of Destiny) from the final Harry Potter. You no longer use the Shadowrun rules of magic, there is no more drain and spells cannot be resisted by the opponents. But you must remember the stupid incantation words or you can't cast spells...
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Nychuus
post Sep 25 2007, 04:10 PM
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Incoming sleep deprived retardation:

The Pokeball (obvious...)
With a successful hit on a throwing test, it sucks a paracritter (if it fails a Body+Will(4)) into a self contained dimension of space. Can store the paracritter indefinitely until released. The paracritter is semi-obedient to the pokeball owner's commands after capture.

Pink Heart belly tattoo (Care Bears)
Projects a ray of happiness! (Mesmerises onlookers with trid-like images. May cause epilepsy)

Centipede Tattoo (Legend of the Five Rings)
You gain:
Athletics Group 7
Doubles your movement speed
Great Leap 6 (as an Adept)
Freefall 6
Gliding
Traceless Walk
Upon arrival of your destination you collapse and sleep for a week.
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Caine Hazen
post Sep 25 2007, 04:55 PM
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The Golden Apple of Discord (Legendary)

Effect: You win Shadowrun; fnord

Bad Stuff: the major Powers That Be want you. I wouldn't let them get you if I were you.
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Kyoto Kid
post Sep 25 2007, 05:42 PM
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QUOTE (Fortune)
QUOTE (Hartbaine @ Sep 25 2007, 12:30 PM)
Kyoto Kid's Keyboard (Dumpshock, Forum)
Effect- You gain Matrix Ettiquette 7 and and a great Street Cred boost but will not be able to go through any conversation without name dropping one or more of your alter egos.

Classic! :D :notworthy:

...I have to admit: :rotfl:

...would even make the Short One giggle (that's #6)
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Eleazar
post Sep 25 2007, 05:50 PM
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Hartbaine, this has to be one of the best threads I have seen in a while, great idea.
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Naysayer
post Sep 25 2007, 07:52 PM
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An obvious one:
Guitar Case (El Mariachi)
Pro's: The Character gains the Ambidextrous positve quality, as well as the Firearms Group at 7, Dodge at 7, Artisan (Guitar) at 6 and a mundane version of the Enthralling Performance adept power at a ridiculously high level.
And guns. Tons of guns.
At the Gamemaster's discretion, the character may also summon the help of a washed out teenage heartthrob latin-pop has-been and a nondescript "wacky" sidekick.
Who also bring guns.
Tons of guns.

Con's: Random druglords, scheming generals and badass thugs will hunt the character at the most inappropriate times. Basically, that means anytime.
Also, eventually, said villains will murder his or her wife/husband.
Probably with guns.

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deek
post Sep 25 2007, 08:20 PM
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Shower Curtain Rings (Trains, Planes & Automobiles)
Effect: Drops all social skills to Untrained (0). Any attempt to get from Point A to Point B using public transportation requires at least four changes of vehicle.

Black Suit (Johnny Mneumonic)
Effect: Grants wearer a permanent Luxury lifestyle but is restricted to high-end hotels. Wearer also gains a Severe Addiction to Room Service.

Antique Puzzle Box (Hellraiser)
Effect: Automatically binds a Force 20 Spirit of Man "Pinhead".
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gknoy
post Sep 25 2007, 09:13 PM
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QUOTE (deek)
Black Suit (Johnny Mneumonic)
Effect: Grants wearer a permanent Luxury lifestyle but is restricted to high-end hotels. Wearer also gains a Severe Addiction to Room Service.

Severe addiction to Room Service. Awesome.
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Hartbaine
post Sep 25 2007, 11:27 PM
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QUOTE (deek @ Sep 25 2007, 03:20 PM)
Black Suit (Johnny Mneumonic)
Effect: Grants wearer a permanent Luxury lifestyle but is restricted to high-end hotels.  Wearer also gains a Severe Addiction to Room Service.


"I want the Club Sandwich... the cold Mexican Beer... I want my shirts laundered. I want a 10,000¥/night hooker!"

F. Murray Abraham's Revolver (Last Action Hero, Movie)
Effect - One chamber is always empty. When and opponent hears the 'click' of the hammer announcing its owner need to reload they will leave their cover and taunt the owner mercilessly... until they are shot by the next avail bullet in the cylinder.

David Levinson's Mac (Independance Day, Movie)
Effect - You can hack anything, even alien computers. This item is completely compatible with any technology. +6 Dice to hacking attempts.

Corbin Dallas's Pistol (5th Element, Movie)
Effect - This weapon always hits as a called shot to the head. +4P damage on all attacks. "Anybody else want to negotiate?"
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Pthgar
post Sep 26 2007, 02:13 AM
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Boomstick: Grants +3 Damage vs. zombies (Shedim) and negates Called Shot penalties (head shot only, Shedim only.)

Chainsaw-hand: A chainsaw is attatched to the character's wrist instead of the hand. Never ending supply of gasoline (possibly due to the spirit power of Wealth.)

Actually not that OP, so I guess I don't win any prizes.
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