Good one-liners, Anyone got some? Options

[Spookymonster]

Pain is a commodity; someone's always lookin' to buy or sell it cheap.

[ShadowDragon8685]

"If I had bullets, I'd shoot you."

[Velocity]

(Said while pursuing a fleeing target): "You can run, but you'll only die tired."

[Hoondatha]

Said by an ex-UCAS sniper, I suppose?

[Grinder]

"Oh no, not again!"

[ShadowDragon8685]

"Is there anything more beautiful than a naked elf chick crying on another naked elf's chick's breasts?" - Overheard frequently in the den of Shadowrunners in the age bracket of 15-25.

[Velocity]

[hyzmarca]

This isn't mine. I stole it from someone. I don't remember who. If you know, please give credit where it is due.

"I would punch you but I don't want to get stupid on my hands."

[Tal]

“Hello, gentlemen. I have come to take your lives.”

"I don't give a damn about my life but if I do die here, I'll make sure I'll drag you down to hell along with me."

[Sabosect]

"Don't mind the troll demolitions expert. She's just PMSing at the moment."

The player got thwapped by the female members of the group for that.

[Wounded Ronin]

"It's a party!"

[Nyxll]

"If keep it up you are going to die of lead poisoning."


After getting slugged in the face by my brother, I replied,
"Nice punch. Your dead."


"You hear the distinctive whir of a vindicater"

To my bleeding comrade.

Nice catch! I thought you were going to miss that bullet.

[Wounded Ronin]

Often times, real-life quotes are the most compellling. Here's one I remember:

"One shot, one kill! Bwahhwahwahwahwah!"

-an aging ex-marine when teaching a basic firearms familiarization course for a physical education class on a municipal outdoor range in New York State.

The key to this quote is to get the goofy giggle at the end right. When done right, it should make everyone at the table also burst out laughing.

[Backgammon]

Moody Shadowrunner background intro:

"I became a killer the day I stole the life from my mother at birth."

Idiotic Street sam logic:

"Quick, cast invinsibility on it! If we can't see it, it's not there!"

[Ancient History]

I love each and every one of your bitter, thrice-damned souls.

[The Grifter]

From Tombstone:

"Your friends might get me in a rush, but not before I turn your head into a canoe."

from Reservoir Dogs:

"You think about shooting me in a dream, you better wake up and apologize."

[Birdy]

And the classics (sometimes borrowed and changed):

"I have six friends here and they are much faster than you"

"A Manhunter beats Kung Fu anytime"

"God created man, Ares made them equal"


Birdy

"Soldier! What are you going to feel when that slimy elf creeps towards your foxhole?"
"Recoil Sergeant! Recoil"

[Kagetenshi]

"Aw man, I just got this leg serviced."

~J

[Catsnightmare]

The 50 year old street sam and the body-of-a-troll physad are talking to the last remaining Yak thug who just attacked them, giving him the option to live and deliver a message to his bosses. The thug quick draws and shoots both chars point blank with a heavy pistol, both targets simply soak Serious wounds to nothing. They both look down at the Yak, the physad cracks his knuckles activating killing hands and the sam springs his cyber spurs saying "You should have taken the first option."

[FrostyNSO]

"Backup toots, Papa's drivin' now."

[Wounded Ronin]

Here's another real-life quote which could work well in Shadowrun:

"A garotte? That's kind of slow. Maybe if you like your work..."

-Ex-marine martial arts instructor from the Bronx discussing old school type silent kills

[SkeevePlowse]

- In a third edition game:

"Count yourself lucky I haven't finished research on Turn to Goo yet."

[lorthazar]

"I see your ten millimeters and raise you thirty." Quickdrawing a MGL-6 in response to an Ares Predator.

"You guys better stay cloaked!" Said after QuickDraw had to take on four Paladins (not all at once) in hand to hand combat becuase the rest of the party had rutheium armor.

"Say it with High Explosive!" After launching a grenade into the Ant Queens chamber.

"Do I look like I care if you live or die?"

[Velocity]

[Wintermancer]

One of my favorite one liners from any of the games I ever ran has a little explaining neccessary to undertand why we all found it so amusing.

There was this one character in my first Shadowrun campaign who just had the worst luck imaginable. It seemed like no matter how much he tweaked himself out, this poor guy couldn't catch a break. Drek just kept happening to him, and he would normaly do okay but then fail at the most critical of moments, which would lead to more opportunities for the storyline to screw him (but in the fun kind of way).

This went on for TWO CAMPAIGNS before his luck finally turned around. When I started the third campaign, we brought another player in, whose character street handle was "Bad Karma". When he was first introduced to the party, they asked what his name was and he said....

"My name isn't important- But you can call me Bad Karma."

The player with the history of bad luck just nodded this knowing nod and said, so flatly:

"Yeah... I've had some of that."

And everybody chuckled.

Of course, the player playing Bad Karma didn't get the joke. And this probably doesn't sound all that funny to you guys, but it sure was funny in context. ;)

Winter