EDIT: Dammit, the Oz version is called Two WORLDS 2 - I may have added to the confusion by mistakenly referring to the recent very pretty looking mocap-game Two Souls

Hoi kids,

After watching Yahtzee rip the new games a steaming third hole, I ran through his old reviews and came across his Two Worlds 2 semi-positive and thought, why not?

The gameplay is basically WOW without the cartoony shaman humping your face (half the time), with a nice "breakdown the loot, upgrade the rest with what you've got" system, somewhat annoying "over the shoulder 3rd person camera" and a disjointed plotline that just keeps tossing up weirdness along the way.

Oh, and the male protagonist is voiced by Satan.
Seriously. This guy is supposed to be the hero and he comes across as the guy who's going to gut-shoot a girl walking a puppy, just to watch someone bleed.

After listening to the hugely uneven dialogue (the mix levels are shockingly bad) the tired, dull gruff tones take on the sound of a guy who needs to shiv a hobo before he can ejaculate; each conversation is the sawing of the tattered ropes he uses to keep the madness at bay before he can kill again without the guards asking awkward questions.
Well until they turn their backs to him, at least.

Why did he jump at the chance to escape in the first act? The bone-deep genocidal need that's his only friend in the world.
His rescuers don't matter - killing them would be a waste of his talent. He needs more fresh bodies to chuckle over...
If the beasts of the Savannah didn't repop, I swear, after each clear moonlit night, each fresh hamlet he walks, sidles or rides into would be a silent ghost town by the 3rd day.

Oh! And the music is rather fetching.

Having fun y'all:)
-Tir

This review seems rather sadistic. You keep elevating it and then stepping on it when your stilettos... this isn't necessarily a bad thing.

I medically need to find a way to work that phrase into my Shadowrun game.

We call that "Wednesday", at home.


I admit though, it's a fun pharase, like, "So jaded, he watches porn for the plot"? and a personal fav, "I've seen better strokes in a nursing home!"
DM <Intoning>"....You mind rebells at what the "before" picture could consist of..."


Of a personal work contact, I've described him to people (who left a decade ago) and they agreed...
"I swear, that guy, he's got a dentist's chair in his basement, you know, the ones with the old timey straps...and pictures of his monther on the wall...watching the chair... I can see it."


-Tir

It looks like depopulating an island IS rather profitable. Forget the missions, that's for chumps! (Well, until you've got the whole nest of skillbooks unlocked, anyhow.)

Also, block-breaker spam FTW!

Ganking Guards, pillaging civilians - woot! some money there!
(FYI, each guard was netting me 2k Auras at level 26)

Get your inner viking-assassin on. GO

Further explorations into the game -

Multiplayer!
Village/sandbox

1: Multiplayer's actually good fun, IF you've got some buddies and if you've all wanting to get your kill on. The "Adventure" mode is really like 1st level dnd. Go here, kill some guys, go fetch and carry peon...and it's tough. You begin at basically "zero" level with a few skills and some crap armour and go bash some wolves and then gradually make your way along the railroad of doom.

In multi you CAN select different bodies and races (cosmetic differences only) and you can choose your basic skill-set. Like the game, you can buy skill books or if you're not in the mood to grind for days, fork out a couple of hundred microsoft points for the kaboodle. Or items, or enhancement stones...smart people, make a nice cheap price so you can get what you want right away.

Although you might want to go tank with a sword (as it's bloody effective) we found out (quickly) that having a magic-user made for awesome, as they can make potions AND upgrade gear. Don't go Necro, trust me - nothing drops until the 2nd last "adventure" with any regularity and everything's resistant to posion/death/aura magics.
About the only awesome thing was that I finally figured out that tanking is for chumps - summon the undead to do it for you, muhuhuhuuhhaaaaa. Seriously, I'm necromoregoththan you, running about with pimped-up minions of doom (11 of them) and my companion's an archer (very high DPS class.) and a multi-discipline mage that's now got an army of stone golems beating up everything.

It's awesome.

Village mode: -Choose wisely, as screwups are easy in the barely-documented moneyfarm.

-tir