Now that is awesome.

Claymore in a fanny pack.

-Siege

Does he also have a pair of hand grenades in the front of his pants?

Fart of death. Hehehe.

And the question on everybody's mind afterwards: "Just WHAT did he eat?!"

And your crotch will be across the room.

Where did the shark go, and when was it jumped exactly?

Must be a small shark or a big fanny.

Dammit, now you got me curious on how to make an inquisitive gerbil out of c4 and still be animated...a homonculous foci/suicide spirit?

Take a gerbil corpse, stuff it with C4 with a detonator... now infuse a shedim spirit into the gerbil corpse. voila.

(I know, I know, but hey, you can keep trying to get that shedim into the gerbil corpse. That's part of the fun.)

For some reason, I just don't want to find out more about this kiki, I refuse to click on that link. lol. I think it's to preserve what little shard of sanity I have left.

bah, sanity is for those who cannot handle reality

Right... so kiki can't sit normally for a while after the 'incident', at least not without the donut thing.

edit: that's still disturbing even with this highlight. Now i have a morbid curiosity to read it. Darn you! lol

[QUOTE=Kyoto Kid][QUOTE=Sandoval
yeah, my GM hates when we do something that completely blows his plans to hades, [/QUOTE]
Yeah this happens to me a lot but that is the part of the game. I have a good background story written and usually three to four encounter paths the team might run into depending on the turns they take. Of course one can never totally plan for what the PCS will do (not even the pre written adventures can do that). During the Rhapsody arc (which just concluded last week) there were several occasions where the team took a tangent. The thing is you have to roll with it.[/QUOTE]
When team goes on a tangent, more power to them, I remember sessions - very enjoyable ones where the team spent 1.5 hours running through different options to infiltrate an SK chems facility:

• lets go through the sewers
• lets knock off / capture some guards and pretend to be them
• lets get delivered into the site on boxes and get transported around to the lab by the "drum rack" (there was a elevated thing transporting drums around the site)
• lets come from the water side, we could arrive on a transporter ship
• lets find some exec and force him
• lets blast our way in
• lets pretend to be the fire brigade (and pretend to do an inspection)

the fire brigade turned up, got to the fire station on site and had planned to activate the fire alarms in the lab they wanted to get to and then we wanted to proceed to investigate the "fire"... well even the best plans fail...

but if players think that they can do any old nonsense and keep pulling guns, someone they do not see might have a cross-hair lined up already, stupidity gets you killed and for the GM its an easy call:
"are they getting on my nerves more when they are alive or will the whining make me sick?"

PS @KyotoKid (not even the pre written adventures can do that) - well some of the purchased ones do not even get close to giving many options

Good example, My players often go through several ideas until they settle on one that they think may work. As with the aforementioned example of instigating the revolution, that was one of five different ideas they discussed while hiding in a barn from a Serb Army patrol.

well we have learned one thing, we DO NOT discuss our plans infront of the GM, he has this bad habit if turning things around on us because of that......thats why almost all of us carry laptops with us to games, we have a wireless network, we can access our books and IM each other to pass notes on what we think we should do, we just keep the GM out of the note loop, he uses it to send us important little tidbit notes that only certain party members (like my phys ad with astral perception) can see or hear and its up to us to pass it along to the other players

will get my GM to copy his to disk and email it to you, if i can, if not i will tell you how he set his up, PM me an email addy for you so i can send it if possible, if not will just delete it

Ok.. this is a good one.

Our group was all D&D players and only one had played SR3 before. Not a biggie.

The group is in Bellevue (AA Rating) in a 5 star hotel. One of them rents a room and the rest sneak into it. Cool so far. They are scoping out their target across the street. And making some progress when...

One of the Sammies (he thought that he was tought sh*t but wasnt) decided to get into a fight with the other sammie.. they trade a few shots (not trying to kill each other but to flex their muscles). This was in the parking garage of a 5star hotel in a AA zone. Hmmm bad news.. They hear sirens so they panic. the one that thought he was hot sh*t decided to throw a plasictics/pipebomb thing at the door of the parking garage between the hotel and the garage (to slow them down). The Rigger happened to be in his van so they all jump in. They hear the sirens getting closers. the bomb goes off and they leave. Ok there is mass confussion as a bomb goes off in a hotel. they are escaping (lone star is coming but not directly behind them). They procedure to argue more. DM is shaking his head (visably) now. When the same genius to start lobbing more of these out of the van window to detonate on contact. So now the van is hot as hell. And the cops see the geniuses face since he has to lean out the window to throw the bomb at the cops (which he missed badly each time). they get away since the rigger was able to out manuevar the cops. And I was trying to be nice since the characters and players were into shadowun about 2 hours at this point and did not want to jump back into D&D. Ok.. that was bad but it gets worse.

The genius no more than 12 hours later (in game time) decides to plant another one of his bombs under a car in a garage of a suspect they want to kidnap. Meanwhile he hasnt worn gloves nor a mask or anyhting. So when he is laying on the ground putting this bomb on the car, others see him and call LS. He is not wearing gloves so his prints are everywhere on the car. He leaves (and this whole bomb on the car thing was not told the group nor disucssed) to go back to the group. LS shows up and gets the bomb, gets prints, camera shots, etc they go to the aparment of the owner of the car and the guys wife (and girlfriend) are dead in a very blooded death. Genius never went to the apartment to see if they were there or alive, they happened to be killed day earlier. So now the genius is linked to a car bomb and 2 murders. Then they realize it is the same fool eariler that day lobbing bombs out a van window at citizens (he was a bad throw). So they put his mug up on the Top 10 most wanted list for Seatle MetroPlex.

The Anti-Government Activist/sammie-type sees that boy genius is on the local SNN (think CNN) for the bombs and such (and the 2 murders). Get frustrated decides to dump the idiot. So the mission is over (except cleanup work) about 3 hours later in game time, The genius goes to the most nortern district of the metroplex to stay at a shaddy motel that the victims (of the 2 murders and the guy they wanted to kidnap) like to go to. He though that the shaddy motel would be a good place to hide,... especially one that your vicitims were frequent visitors to. So the activist goes to a chinese all you can eat buffett and uses their pay phone disguising himself as much as possible with no disguise gear (at least he is trying!) and calls LS. At this point LS is offering 250k reward and the group (5 players) might have 50k at best pooled so it is very tempting to take it.... decides against it. The Activist narcs on the boy genius.

Now it gets even better. LS show ups with SWAT teams. Multiple. More cops than a donut shop that is giving away from donuts. 2 snipers train on the door. someone from SWAT knocks on the door asking the person to exit the room with their hands up. Besides the 2 snipers aiming down the hallway at the door (1 from each direction) there is a full SWAT team with the snipers rearing to go down teh hallway. The genius answers the door with a bomb in his hand saying that if they dont leave he will set the timer and throw it. BANG BANG (2 simutanous shots from panthers). No more genius.


Now the player gets mad that they would not have sent the SWAT team after him let along multiple. What is a few bombs?

I wanted to strangle the player.....

Wow, that guy was very stupid.

you mean they had rayford do the vocal reading of it.....oh drek...i gotta hear this thats gotta be histerical,

hey Kyoto kid, i was wrong and i'm sorry, it wasnt a battle board he had on his computer, though he does have one for D&D it was a Excel Spreadsheet set up with all the mods ready for initiative

Xinu, ouch. I feel sorry for you. Dumb mother @*%^@)^er.

Newbies and the Demolitions skill do not mix. ESPECIALLY if they have no Throwing skill! @%*&)@!%!)!!!!

If he really needs dermal armor in that region... I fear for any of his chummers who have to sit in the same vehicle as him when he farts and such.

Scene - inside old Coal Mine
Phobia, Severe - rats; a swarm of rats around the character; Fireball.
TPK

So this is where Bubba the Prison Troll comes in, neh?

Somebody ought to rename this the "Shadowrun Darwin Awards" thread

Here's one in the players-turning-on players colunmn. The GM was the older brother of one of my old high-school buddies, just come back into town. The team consisted of me (a gun-using physad), the GM's girlfriend (a first-time gamer playing a mage), a VERY dumb troll (he was unbelievably entertaining but even more counter-productive--the PLAYER knew what he was doing though, thankfully), and another player ... we'll call him "the Blaster" for a character he created later. As for this 'run, "the Blaster" was playing a female ganger-type who had repeatedly informed us that she had some kind of price on her head. About 25000 if I recall.

Now, the run was going very badly, largely due to the efforts of the Blaster. See, just before the initial meet when the group first got together (did I mention that this was the first game in our campaign?), she had kneed some guy at the (very seedy) bar in the crotch--with a lot of successes on Unarmed, so he died.

Here's the really good part, though. Eventually we were hired to extract a guy from a small-ish corp. We thought we had him traced to his apartment, so in trying to get past building security, the Blaster frags up the keypad (probably alerting Lonestar, I don't know ...) and makes his way up to the apartment in question banging on the door until it opens. The gentleman inside opens up. "Are you Mr. Target?" the Blaster asks. "Um. No," says Innocent Bystander. Replies the Blaster: "Oops--sorry!" and fires a heavy pistol at this poor man.

That was when we decided to take the bounty. We ambushed the Blaster in Big Dumb Troll's van. I did very little from the backseat and (a) not wanting to fire off any of my weapons at close range and (b) not having clubs skill ... so mostly it was between the troll and the Blaster. Blaster was human, and troll was, well, a troll. At close quarters, GM ruled that the +1 reach would be a -1 to the troll ... and what does Blaster do? Pulls out his katana with +1 reach.

We managed to take him alive and secure the bounty. In addition, we managed to survive, if not complete, the run. (Fortunate, since we ended up finding out that we were hired by Saeder-Krupp initially ...)

Actually one stupid death occured to me that happened in a game I was playing in.

The characters:
Voodoo Shaman
Fenrir Shaman (me)
Rigger

The run was a meet gone bad with someone that later turned out to be a vampire and his thrall. (It's been like 5 years, so details are hazy) We were fleeing, and I (injured with a moderate wound) hopped into the rigger's van with the voodoo shaman already inside. I screamed "GO GO GO GO!" and the rigger stepped on it.

This is where the wierdness happened. The voodoo shaman said "Stop! I want to get out!" The players all gaped at him and said the generic variation on "huh?" He repeated his demand, and I said "Screw that!" The Rigger, seeing the big baddie approaching the van, wasn't slowing down.

Then the player playing the voodoo said "Alright, you asked for it." And cast Hot Potato on the rigger.

.......who promptly failed his resist and ripped the jack out trying to get his cyberware out of his body. This resulted in a crash test, which gave everyone a moderate wound. This is not a good thing - because I got a moderate wound, and Fenrirs go berserk and attack the thing that hurt them if they fail a willpower check. I failed, so I pulled out my Savallette Guardian and shot at the thing I viewed as causing my hurt - the voodoo shaman. One Burst later, the Voodoo Shaman was dead. My character FINALLY snapped out of the berserk fugue and healed the shaman back to consciousness, but he still insisted on leaving the van - so we dumped his butt on the street and left him at that point.

Oy. We didn't work with that character again.

The other stupid death in that campaign actually resulted in a Deux et Machina from the GM to back time up and prevent it from happening. My character was the rigger this time, and we had just successfully pulled off a run on an island and had escaped scot-free in our powerboats.

Out of nowhere, one of the bastards in our group said to the GM, "The Rigger can't see what I'm doing right?"
GM: "Yes"
Bastard: "Then I take my shotgun and blow the rigger's brains out."

This at the boats top speed. I was enraged, but couldn't do anything about it. The GM calmly stopped me from making a fool of myself and asked the guy why he would do that.

"One less person in the cut."
GM: "But he's the one driving the boat."
"I figure I could take control and drive us back..."

We finally drove it into his head that killing the rigger would NOT result in calm boat stopping - probably would result in immediate crash test as the controls spasm flipping him and everyone else into the bay at the speed the boat was going at. At that point the GM said "You aren't going to do that. Save it for later if you still must." and backed things up.

Needless to say, I never had my character go alone with his character again.

From the first story: Did the voodoo shaman ever explain his reasoning for wanting to get out?

I had a nice double cross once. My character went to cover a teamate orc while he underwent cyberware surgery. After the doc's knocked him out, I payed them to put a remote kink in his brain. The look on the players face was priceless. I never did get to use the remote, but it was still worth it.

Not really, actually. Apparently he had never wanted to get IN the van in the first place. But IIRC the real reason was not a very convincing one and none of us bought it.

Silliest NPC death.

A squad of armored sec guards has taken up position at one end of the hallway.

The PCs are having a hastily whispered debate about what to do.

The GM announces that an NPC wiz-something declares, "I'm going invisible and do a quick recon down the hallway."

Everyone else in the party heard him say this. Except for our PC mage who happened to be dating the NPC.

We knew this because the PC mage said, "ok - I fire a burst down the hallway to keep the guards at bay..."

The return volume of fire coming down the hallway would have done a Schwarzenegger film proud.

The GM sighed and shredded the NPC sheet while the rest of us dissolved in laughter at the expression on the PC mage's face as we explained what happened.

-Siege

Ah, stupid player death #1, I remember it fondly.
Mostly because it was my first ever night of roleplaying.
So the entire team gets air-dropped somewhere in the Andes, iirc. There's a decker, a ninja sammy, me a troll tank the gm rolled up for me, a mage and a drone rigger.
Everything's going well, we have to snatch and grab some odd bit of something out of a compound. On the approach we find some cybered-to-hell sammy that the decker golden BB's with his predator and pistol skill of 6 (called headshot from long range, all success +karma pool twice, followed by a lot of 1s and 2s on the sam's resistance roll). So all the Sam's are feeling a little screwed out of glory, but whatever. The enemy sam didn't even get a shot off.
Not far away are two security guards. The ninja SK's one and I knock the other one on his ass and take his gun. To get to the compound from here, we have to ride a gondola. Everyone climbs on board, and the ninja takes the guard for interrogation. So ninja gets the enemies' com frequency out've him, switches over to it, and learns that security from the compound is alerted. Even more alarming, LAW rockets are incoming towards our gondola.
So what does the ninja do?
....
Nothing. We all get blasted by the missile.
So everybody but me and the ninja fail miserably on our resistance tests against the rocket. Then we fall. I believe that soak started in deadly overflow. So now the ninja is dead.
My first night ever playing any roleplaying games, and I'm stuck in the middle of the Andes in hostile territory.
So that was a good start to my roleplaying career.

Here's a recent death (two days ago RL)

The team consisted of 2 sammies, a TM, and a mage, aswell as a rigger NPC. The run starts out well, a simple prototype ares gun grab. Well when one of the guys grabs the gun, a modified Panther cannon, the other sammie starts loading up on ammunition and gun components from the next room (not wanting to risk anything that could be traced). So there's the sammie with the gun, and is taking it to the getaway van, when he subvocalizes to the others (we use notes for subvocalizing, and talk for vocal meetings, mostly for roleplaying) well the TM then straps the gun in to the back and gets up front to be the "driver", and the sammie that brought it in buckles in to the back beside the Rigger. Well there has been no alarm raised yet due to spectacular roles by the TM to keep the systems down, and the cameras looped, and all security they knew of was down for good.

So this is where it goes wrong. A security guy they thought had died after he crawled off called in back up, and soon there is a 5 man team dropped into the building from a helicopter. So the rigger, whose drone spots this tells the Mage and the other Sammie to get out of the building and into the van already, is completely ignored, and the sammie and mage start loading up on XX rounds, and all sorts of a gun bunny's wet dreams. So the kill team comes in and starts shooting, which the two players didnt think would happen for awhile, and they run off to the room that had all of the ammo and spare parts. This is when the sammie notices all the grenades stored there and starts to lob them out, hoping to make an opening to leave. Well 2 kill team guys die, 1 is injured and trying to find cover and 2 get in the room. Next the mage uses a overcast Fireball - Force 12 in the room..... well to say the least, the player of the sammie rightfully kicked the player of the mage for a few minutes, and both of them got to work making new chars while the rest of the pcs did a getaway and sold their loot.



I also decided to try the gerbil thing, having it blow up one of the teams ganger friends when they were in the bar, describing it much like shorty in scary movie. And now whenever I feel like making the players nervous or laugh, I make a normal gerbil appear from a crack in a wall, or from under the stairs just to remind them that anything can happen

It was either that or the ass cannon gerbil...either way, something to take the group's mind off their current predicament.

I think the most memorable death I've experience in Shadowrun is when one player had six grenades strapped to his chest.

We where about to raid a club and he says, "I'm going to run in, pull the pins out and run back out."

The GM said, "Are you sure?"

He said, "Yup."

The GM said, "You want to run in, pull the pins out and run out again. Just that?"

"Yup."

"Ok, you run into the club and see people dancing, gyrating against one another. You pull all the pins out of your grenades and run outside. The grenades, still strapped to your chest, explode. Make a new character, please."