"Yeah, the Black Shakes. What causes it?" "What causes it? This causes it! This causes it! This causes it! Information overload! All the electronics around you poisoning the airwaves. Technological fucking civilization. But we still have all this shit, because we can't live without it."



-k

I never really figured out if AIPS was real, or just a coverup for Technomancers.

Since it came up recently...

3097: After taking sufficient control of the security network of an underwater laboratory my primary interest should not be how I can drown people.
3098: When the GM, in an attempt to keep the body count low, suggests that I merely lock the security personnel room so we only have a fraction of opposition, I should leave it at that.
3098a: When being told that the system has no control over the water valves, and merely controls the environmental characteristics, I am not to set the oxygen levels to a lethal ratio.
3098b: Nor am I to impersonate HAL 9000 over the room's intercom while the oxygen levels go down.
3098c: Shutting my own team into a room, then doing the oxygen level stunt for the rest of the station aswell, is not considered fair game. GMs don't like their entire opposition literally put to sleep.
3098d: Nor am I ever to bring that story up in the vicinity of my GM again. Lest I want to experience the "decline of oxygen in my lungs" first hand IRL.

Together with the pizza DO-NOTs, you should have a pretty good idea how that particular underwater run went about...

3099: Since the GM got his 'Running Wild', I am not allowed to arm my gunslinger adept with an arsenal of quickdraw-holstered weapons filled with specific ammo for every allergy/weakness I could find in the rulebooks, just in case.

This post has been edited by Elvaron: Dec 10 2010, 02:52 AM

3100: If I do make an ork orc character, I shall not attempt to make him a British Soccer football fan, and use this as an excuse to behave like a Warhammer 40,000 ork
3101: Hijacking a fighter jet will get me shot down unless I somehow manage to hack a flightplan in
3101a: Even if I do manage to hack a flight plan in, it should never take me over megacorprate territory. This goes double if the plane was armed
3102: No, technomancers may not just shift their living persona into a shell and let the meat body die
3103: My orc mage may not have a tradition that is based on "Da Big Waagh"
3103a: If I do have an orc mage that follows anything resembling the above, I am not allowed to have my powerball take the form of a giant green foot from heaven
3104: Catholic mages and tantric magic do not mix
3104a: Nor do Catholic mages and NAMBLA, so my hacker shall stop insisting they do
3104b: NAMBLA does not mix with -anything-, period

3104b sub 1: Except prepubecent boys, who shall be kept away at all costs.

The AIPS was real enough. It's just a medical designation for the symptoms that TM's and other folk were exhibiting after Crash 2.0.

PTSD for the Internet, with technomaaaaagic.

3105: I shall refrain from having any character who has read Santayana and quotes him often. Just because I am often right about those who haven't learned from their past....
3106: A silenced HMG is -not- subtle, no matter what my weapons specialist might say
3107: If I try to design a catcrossbow a la Adam West, I am no longer allowed access to cats
3107a: If I try to design the same crossbow to fire dwarves instead, my troll is not allowed to have it
3107b: Nor may I mount either design on a vehicle
3108: The vehicle weapons are -never- made in man portable designs
3108a: I may no longer use the Panther XL as reason to try and con the DM otherwise
3109: Kittehs and Johnsons do not mix
3110: Orbital drops are not a good idea
3110a: Even if I do equip everyone with powered MilSpec armor
3110b: And even if I do modify a balistic shuttle
3110c: And even if I -do- play the theme music from Roughnecks

Ammo skip system ftw.

I'm pretty sure I'm not allowed to do that either with every single allergic material I can find in the source books. Nor are there sunlight bullets.

Also, (and I don't want to make this thread political... for the same reason this disallowance was issued) I'm not allowed to create a decker with the nickname AnonOp. It annoys the rest of the group when I preach on and on about transparency. I'm being told it has no bearing in a roleplaying game, the GM is not an oppressing government, I can not demand transparency (read: look behind the GM screen) and throwing dice at him with both hands does not count as an effective DDoS.

This post has been edited by Elvaron: Dec 13 2010, 02:49 AM

My only issue with the ammo skip system is that you have to pick up the rounds it ejected and shove 'em back in the clip/magazine (and for cylinder systems you still have to fire the shots and get diddly from them). Personally, I go for double-clip and two ammo types. Free action to change types FTW.

I sense a disturbance in the nerd force.

*pulls back the screen to reveal those ork gangers DID roll enough dice to kill you, but the GM let it slide for plot purposes*
"I demand a lack of transparency!"

Also, UV light on the under barrel.

3111: I may not fill the Street Sweeper with tampons to try to make it a stun weapon.

3111a: I may not fill the Street Sweeper with used tampons to try to make the opposiition commit suicide, or be rendered incapacitated due to violent retchng.

3111b: I am not allowed to weaponize tampons, used or otherwise, for any purpose.
3111c: Despite being extant in the early Naughties, Tampon shaped tasers are right out (item no. eight).

>> Tampon shaped tasers*

That list is AWESOME! While we already have the shock glove, the bulletproof pull-over-your-head bag and mutants that can shoot lightning out of their hands, we certainly need a pumpgun-in-a-flashlight. Do you want to send this to the SR devs or should I? (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)

*for some reason I can't quote it.

It's all yours.

Ok...this list is making me list these items because, despite the hillarity, this list -has- given a friend of mine scary ideas...

3112: This list is not a to-do list for other games. Just because "not allowed to do in Shadowrun" doesn't mean it's ok in any other game. The only exception to this rule is for games which have any mentioned items of naughtyness as a key part of the game
3113: For the love of all that's holy, no firing used tampons at the vampires as a distraction
3114: No more weaponizing anything that would result in the GM and/or other players wanting to hit me over the head with the Hammer of Justice™

3115: I am not to make any characters in SR or do anything in SR that would make my RIFTS GM reach for a stick.

3116: If the otherworldly creature of immense power asks, "Are you a God?", I am not allowed to answer "No."
3116a: Nor am I allowed to answer, "Yes."
3116b: In fact, I am not allowed to answer, period.
3117: "Nuke 'em all from orbit, it's the only way to be sure." is not a good plan to ensure that Stuffer Shacks do not infest the entire world like cockroaches.

How fitting, because, as the humble cockroach, Stuffer Shack would thrive in even the most nuclear-devastated environment. Otherwise there would be nothing to eat in Chicago but the bug spirits... Coincidence, I think not...

3118: If I play a red oni physad, I may not have his geas be "shout "OH YEAH!" in a kool-aid man voice"

3119: I may not plan an assassination of Kenneth Brackhaven utilizing the "four horsemen of the apocalypse" drugs in capsule rounds.
3119a: K10 is not War, even though it incites such in it's targets.
3119b: Warp is not Pestilence even though it may create hallucinations of it.
3119c: Shade is not Famine, though it deprives the target of their body.
3119d: Ymir is not Death... Actually, it totally is.

3120: When confronted by an ungoblinized clone of my ork character, I am not allowed to play it cool and "accept the fact" that I am actually the clone (wink).

3119e: Even if it would gain you the accolades of everyone in Seattle, and a good number of people in the UCAS, no, you cannot kill Kenny at all. Even if it doesn't make you a bastard. He'll just pop back up, injured, and looking better in the polls for surviving an assassination attempt.

Actually I think he wakes up the following day in his own bed, regardless of where or how he died.
(I've seen a scant few South Park episodes, but this is the impression I've gotten)