 Deformity Negative Quality, Can a deformity be an "asset" as well? |
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 Aug 24 2010, 07:19 PM
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#126
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Runner  Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688  |
This is going to be the greatest bar story never told.
=== We pulled up to the drop-off point in a hijacked limousine amidst a throng of people. Word really had gotten out that we had the dongs - all of them. There were fewer now as we got out of the car. Shecky was nursing a nasty concussion from the crash, Mook broke his arm and lost his favorite MMG, and AJ was sporting a black eye and a bloody nose from getting smacked in the face with one of The Johnson's dongs. I had enough cuts on me from one of the Elf's razorboys that it looked like I'd gotten the raw end of it in a Tiajuana cockfight. But we still came out on top, and the Elf was left hanging in the breeze. A mighty bellow parted the crowd before us. We could hear The Johnson shouting as he came out of the house, still in his bathrobe and being trailed by his retinue. I could count another three or four bubbly beach-blonde heads in the group- it was like they were reproducing like rabbits in there. I was going to kill Sooz for this later. "Stand aside, my boys gotta breathe!" he shouted, muscling his way through and getting the crowd to give us some space. Inside the limo were two large strongboxes filled with coins, one of them open to show the lustre of gold. A hush rippled through the crowd as the glitter of Johnson's dongs caused all conversation to cease. The sight of 'em caused a silence so great you could hear a pin drop. "They're beautiful," I could hear one of the blondes say. "I just want to rub them all over my face!" "You'll get the chance," Johnson replied as he wired our payment over. "I'll have the girls polish all these off - they don't mind the mess." The crowd moved in to help handle Johnson's special delivery. They were dumped into bulging sacks that they heaved inside to be cleaned and polished, all set for display. He pulled me aside as the focus left us. "I gotta know," he said. "Didja give it to The Elf?" "Yeah," I replied. "We gave it to 'im real good. Mook got the best piece of all of us, though." "Yeah?" he asked, his eyes a-glitter. "What'd he do?" "See, Mook's claim to fame is he hits harder 'n a mule can kick. He calls it his 'Donkey Punch.'" The Johnson startled the crowd with his braying laugh, and he thumped me on the back. He yelled, "Leave a couple of these for my delivery guys! And quit playin' with 'em so much or they'll make you go blind!" That's why I've got a picture of The Johnson on my wall, and why you don't polish gold in directed light. |
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Aug 24 2010, 07:21 PM
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#127
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 516 Joined: 22-July 10 From: Detroit Member No.: 18,843 |
QUOTE (Doc Chase @ Aug 24 2010, 03:19 PM)  "See, Mook's claim to fame is he hits harder 'n a mule can kick. He calls it his 'Donkey Punch.'" Not going to lie, I laughed so hard at that, my stomach hurts now (IMG:style_emoticons/default/wink.gif) |
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Aug 24 2010, 07:22 PM
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#128
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688 |
See, it's not necessarily an advantage, but Deformity can add a lot of flavour to a game. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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Aug 24 2010, 07:37 PM
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#129
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 252 Joined: 11-June 10 Member No.: 18,694 |
I think the thread has reached its natural conclusion now... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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Aug 24 2010, 07:51 PM
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#130
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 2,579 Joined: 30-May 06 From: SoCal Member No.: 8,626 |
QUOTE (Squiddy Attack @ Aug 24 2010, 11:37 AM) I think the thread has reached its natural conclusion now... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) Foul! Improper wording! Correction below! I think the thread has reached its climax now... (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) |
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Aug 24 2010, 07:52 PM
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#131
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 252 Joined: 11-June 10 Member No.: 18,694 |
I was tempted to say that, but...
... Ah, hell. I have no excuse. |
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Aug 24 2010, 07:53 PM
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#132
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688 |
I think that's a little...premature.
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Aug 24 2010, 07:55 PM
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#133
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 252 Joined: 11-June 10 Member No.: 18,694 |
Oh, come on. We have to get off the subject sometime.
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Aug 24 2010, 08:10 PM
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#134
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688 |
For what it's worth, I hope so.
The one-liner intro theme from CSI: Miami won't get out of my head. |
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Aug 24 2010, 08:25 PM
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#135
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Advocatus Diaboli Group: Members Posts: 13,994 Joined: 20-November 07 From: USA Member No.: 14,282 |
Blah, those were both pretty flaccid, Squiddy Attack. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/frown.gif)
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Aug 24 2010, 08:29 PM
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#136
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688 |
Chalk it up to performance anxiety.
GAH THERE GOES THE THEME AGAIN |
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Aug 24 2010, 08:36 PM
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#137
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Advocatus Diaboli Group: Members Posts: 13,994 Joined: 20-November 07 From: USA Member No.: 14,282 |
It's okay, it happens to lots of posters. :/ It doesn't make you less of a… whatever you are. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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Aug 24 2010, 08:37 PM
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#138
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 2,579 Joined: 30-May 06 From: SoCal Member No.: 8,626 |
QUOTE (Yerameyahu @ Aug 24 2010, 01:36 PM) It's okay, it happens to lots of posters. :/ It doesn't make you less of a… whatever you are. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif) It's never happened before, I swear! |
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Aug 24 2010, 08:45 PM
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#139
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Advocatus Diaboli Group: Members Posts: 13,994 Joined: 20-November 07 From: USA Member No.: 14,282 |
We can just minmax and argue until you're ready to try again, honey.
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Aug 24 2010, 08:50 PM
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#140
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688 |
I'm sorry baby, I just-- I have a headache, baby. I'm just gonna take some asprin and go to bed.
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Aug 31 2010, 12:42 PM
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#141
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 200 Joined: 23-March 10 From: Nashville, TN, CAS Member No.: 18,348 |
It really isn't the length of your post that matters, it's what you do with it.
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Aug 31 2010, 01:01 PM
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#142
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Immortal Elf Group: Dumpshocked Posts: 14,358 Joined: 2-December 07 From: Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada Member No.: 14,465 |
Yeah, keep telling yourself that. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)
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Aug 31 2010, 01:32 PM
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#143
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 3,179 Joined: 10-June 10 From: St. Louis, UCAS/CAS Border Member No.: 18,688 |
The headache managed to suppress the thread for a week. Not bad. (IMG:style_emoticons/default/nyahnyah.gif)
I have been told that a slow, rhythmic posting style with the ability to plunge to new depths is highly preferred. Sprinkling your experience with teasers, a bit of 'dirty talk' and perhaps some verbal spankings can bring understanding to new heights for both parties. Just be sure to shield your...arguments from contamination. Know your debate partner, and post wisely. |
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Aug 31 2010, 01:35 PM
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#144
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 595 Joined: 20-January 09 Member No.: 16,795 |
Dumpshock Forum's servers, now hosted from Fire Island's Meat Rack.
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Aug 31 2010, 05:23 PM
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#145
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Runner Group: Members Posts: 2,579 Joined: 30-May 06 From: SoCal Member No.: 8,626 |
QUOTE (Dwight @ Aug 31 2010, 05:35 AM) Dumpshock Forum's servers, now hosted from Fire Island's Meat Rack. Does it involve meatspin as well? |
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Aug 31 2010, 05:29 PM
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#146
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 595 Joined: 20-January 09 Member No.: 16,795 |
QUOTE (X-Kalibur @ Aug 31 2010, 10:23 AM) Does it involve meatspin as well? Not sure, probably. I do know it does involve a big, jiggly-boob man-hug from a sweat drenched and bald Meatloaf. |
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Aug 31 2010, 05:54 PM
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#147
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Immortal Elf Group: Members Posts: 10,289 Joined: 2-October 08 Member No.: 16,392 |
QUOTE (Dwight @ Aug 31 2010, 12:29 PM) Not sure, probably. I do know it does involve a big, jiggly-boob man-hug from a sweat drenched and bald Meatloaf. What a sausage fest. |
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Aug 31 2010, 06:43 PM
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#148
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Moving Target Group: Members Posts: 431 Joined: 15-April 10 Member No.: 18,454 |
QUOTE (Draco18s @ Aug 31 2010, 12:54 PM) What a sausage fest. Hillshire Farms, GO MEAT! |
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