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Those damn stroke victims get all the coolest gadgets.

No kidding. Ever heard of the wheelchair that can go up stairs? It was invented by Dean Kamen. Of course, he's the same tard who invented the segway, so maybe it costs ten thousand bucks or something.

Brain operated computers, stair climbing wheelchairs, mere mortals were not meant to possess such power. Some one must stop them before they destroy us all!
*shakes fist*

Let's wait until they get ASIST and RSA figured out. Better start planning how you guys'll drop that money into the stock market now.