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RunnerPaul
So, you're a shadowrunner, and one of your teammates on your runner team took the dependent flaw. Of course, that means at this time of year, presents are expected.

You know that the assault rifle you got her last year was a big hit, but one of your other teammates got her a backup pistol, so she's pretty well stocked up.

You know the kid is into retro toys, so you look around a bit and find the perfect gift: A Coloring/"How to Draw" Book of military hardware. Added Bonus: because it's from China, it's also got a primer on how to write in Chinese, which will be fun for her when the team takes that trip to Hong Kong next year.
Kagetenshi
How old is the kid? If she's going to turn a major year (10, 13, something like that) you could splurge and get her her first cyberlimb.

~J
Konsaki
Or for the kiddies with the magical touch, a power focus or weapon focus would be right up the alley.
eidolon
I can't believe nobody has given her a datajack yet.

(And before you point out the obvious, see my sig. wink.gif)
hyzmarca
Quality hardcore porn BTLs. And when I say quality I mean it. It should have full sensory feeds from every participant accessible individually and in any combination. Multiple participants are a must and a full orgy is recommended. Unusual sex acts and partners, too, not just the vanilla intercourse they'll find in any G-rated Disney sim. You might draw a line at rape and snuff from the POV of the victim, but that really depends on the kid. Some people like that sort of thing.

Alternately, for that special personal touch, you can make a simsense recording of one of your runs so that the kid will be able to see what mommy or daddy does for a living.
Dentris
Nobody thought about the brand new SteelLynx equipped with the reliable Ingram White Knight, plenty of autosofts and a VirtualPet™ along with his dog brain.

The new generation of pet. They'll never worry about the yakuzas hitting on their dependents anymore.
Konsaki
Heh, a Sim recording of the night the kid was made... Thats a real kicker for the birds and the bees.
Kagetenshi
QUOTE (Konsaki)
Or for the kiddies with the magical touch, a power focus or weapon focus would be right up the alley.

For them, go all-out: two cyberlimbs.

~J
RunnerPaul
They say Rocket Launchers are a hot item with the kids this year.
Trax
In one campaign we gave a Hell Hound puppy to ours, well..the Troll did. We all gave her stuff that wouldn't set fire to the furniture, or the hair of sleeping passed out team mates.
BookWyrm
THIS
Kagetenshi
Pah. At least go with this. That way she won't be disappointed when she goes after an armored car someday.

~J
Crossfire
How about a dikoted battleaxe?

Peace!

Crossfire
FrankTrollman
Linguasofts. Like 3 of them.

All kids love to travel, and now when you send them travelling, they'll be able to get back home.

-Frank
Fortune
A Jon-Benet Ramsey persona-fix chip.
Wounded Ronin
*sigh*

QUOTE

Small children need compact, polymer frame single stack .380 ACPs with really light triggers. - Austere Emancipator


'nuff said.
will_rj
Why not get that brand new pair of cybereyes every other kid in the Ark seems to be using these days ?
SL James
QUOTE (Kagetenshi @ Dec 3 2006, 03:40 PM)
Pah. At least go with this. That way she won't be disappointed when she goes after an armored car someday.

Forget the kid. Give me one of those, and have it delivered by a naked eastern European model.

Inappropriate link removed.
-eidolon


QUOTE (Fortune)
A Jon-Benet Ramsey persona-fix chip.

Then the emotional response won't be real when you attach her to a full-X simsense rig and... yeah.

Strange Days is a fucked-up movie, and it is proof that there is something very wrong with James Cameron.
bishop186
QUOTE (SL James @ Dec 3 2006, 06:00 PM)
Inappropriate link removed.
-eidolon

Yup, that was definitely NWS.
Fortune
QUOTE (bishop186)
Yup, that was definitely NWS.

Works for me! biggrin.gif

QUOTE
Strange Days is a fucked-up movie, and it is proof that there is something very wrong with James Cameron.


While I won't dispute that one little bit, I still maintain hope for a sequel.
FrankTrollman
I think we know what our teammates' children are going to get.

-Frank
Angelone
So what kind of gun is that? Hard to for me tell from that shot.

EDIT- It looks to small to be a .50 cal but I could be wrong.

EDIT2- Pet wise you can't beat a Drop Bear. I hear childeren love monofiliment btw.
Ryu
Hyzmarca, you are really walking the line lately... bad times? Hopefully christmas will cheer you up biggrin.gif
Kagetenshi
What line?

~J
hyzmarca
Actually, Shadowbeat implies a strong liberalization of attitudes about depictions of sex on television and a subsequent absorption of the porn industry by "mainstream" Hollywood to the point that most trideo shows and movies contain explicit non-simulated sex acts.

For example, Shadowbeat states that "medium" pornographic sitcoms make up some of the more popular prime-time lineups. Now, I won't pretend to know the author's definition of "medium" but given the liberalization of attitudes about pornography I'd say it falls somewhere between the feather and the chicken, or in this case between a late night Cinemax movie and the stuff Max Fister's Dungeon.

There is also the fact the sitcoms, even the more risque ones, generally are considered to be "family friendly" entertainment. This was especially true around the time that Shadowbeat was published, with ABC's TGIF block dominating everything else. This implies that porn is considered to be "family friendly" in the Sixth World.

You know those statistics that show that kids in the USA watch so many simulated murders and so many implied sex acts on television in a year? Well in the Sixth World many of those murders aren't simulated at all and most of the sex acts are both real and explicit.

In other words, it is perfectly acceptable to give porn to young children for Christmas if you live in the UCAS, at least this is implied by Shadowbeat. They'll certainly have seen plenty of it on the trid. And if you live in Aztlan it may be perfectly acceptable to give small children enslaved prisoners that they can force to fight to the death for their own amusement for Christmas.
lorechaser
QUOTE (BookWyrm)
THIS

I got that.

It's exceedingly amusing, and the object of envy.
lorechaser
Again, it all comes back to Transmetropolitan.

Sex Puppets is one of the most highly rated children's shows at the time.
BookWyrm
QUOTE (bishop186 @ Dec 3 2006, 05:06 PM)
QUOTE (SL James @ Dec 3 2006, 06:00 PM)
Inappropriate link removed
-eidolon

Yup, that was definitely NWS.

O_O
OK, what was that (or at least, what was that from)?
Kagetenshi
QUOTE (SL James)
Inappropriate link removed.
-eidolon

Was there a change in policy that we were not alerted to? Please, tell us now.

~J
eidolon


No, no change, I just hadn't noticed it yet. And yes, there probably is other stuff up right now that could be nixed based on the following, so don't waste keystrokes asking.


QUOTE (DSF posting guidelines)
No pornographic, sexually offensive, sexually explicit, or objectifying material. We'd like for our readers to be able to read the forums at work and share with friends without fear of retribution.
Kagetenshi
Yes, I read that. You may want to edit the guidelines if you want to make them also apply to linked, rather than posted, material, as the link text was none of the things listed.

~J
eidolon
A fair point. I'll bring it up, thanks.
Angelone
QUOTE (BookWyrm @ Dec 4 2006, 07:36 PM)
QUOTE (bishop186 @ Dec 3 2006, 05:06 PM)
QUOTE (SL James @ Dec 3 2006, 06:00 PM)
Inappropriate link removed
-eidolon

Yup, that was definitely NWS.

O_O
OK, what was that (or at least, what was that from)?

It was a blurry motivational poster of a naked model firing off a machine gun of some kind. You can find it in Crimsondude's motivational posters if you are interested in seeing it.

Tagline was
A street samurai's wetdream
Wow did you see that gun?
Trax
QUOTE (Angelone)
QUOTE (BookWyrm @ Dec 4 2006, 07:36 PM)
QUOTE (bishop186 @ Dec 3 2006, 05:06 PM)
QUOTE (SL James @ Dec 3 2006, 06:00 PM)
Inappropriate link removed
-eidolon

Yup, that was definitely NWS.

O_O
OK, what was that (or at least, what was that from)?

It was a blurry motivational poster of a naked model firing off a machine gun of some kind. You can find it in Crimsondude's motivational posters if you are interested in seeing it.

Tagline was
A street samurai's wetdream
Wow did you see that gun?

There was a gun? biggrin.gif
Ryu
Yeah, but it was hidden. Like the magic picture thingy; just look long enough.
eidolon
No man, you have to look through the picture.
Kagetenshi
I just want to know what was NWS about a nice gun. wink.gif

~J
Lindt
Wow, the nerf rifle of stupid is only 30 bucks? I could totally hit my co-workers from the other end of the office.

Funny, my first thought on reading this topic was "Shit... who tells their running mates they have kids. Its like ASKING for leverage to be used against them
PBTHHHHT
QUOTE (Lindt @ Dec 5 2006, 03:09 PM)
Funny, my first thought on reading this topic was "Shit... who tells their running mates they have kids.  Its like ASKING for leverage to be used against them

eh, if someone uses the kids as leverage, the runner can pull a Keyser Soze, it'll add more angst/edge to their backstory... wink.gif

[ Spoiler ]
hyzmarca
Never, ever, let a hostage live. Kill them always and make the hostage takers suffer a fate worse than death if at all possible. This tactic will discourage terrorists and criminals from taking hostages in the long run and it will encourage perspective hostages to fight to the death rather than complacently allowing themselves to be captured.
fistandantilus4.0
shoot the hostage huh? I wonder if LoneStar, well, maybe not the star, but maybe HardCorps would take this tact.
Kagetenshi
Why do you think the 'Star wouldn't do it? I mean, maybe if contract renewals were coming up, but otherwise…

~J
fistandantilus4.0
That was my reason precisely actually. hard corps, well that's what peopel expect from them. If they wanted "Nicer" security, they would have paid for Knight Errant, since they're both Ares companies.
Ryu
"Rescue or bury" the hostages IS a deterance strategy, but killing the hostages on purpose is somewhat less desireable. On the other hand, if the exex wanted a new wife anyway...
nezumi
It occurs to me that rescuing hostages from 10 kidnappings with full media support would bring better publicity than 2 hostages and kidnappers killed and 8 kidnappings completely prevented. After all, if you don't regularly see things about Lone Star catching crooks and saving people, might you begin to wonder why the city is paying so much money when crime really is very low already.
BookWyrm
QUOTE (Angelone)
QUOTE (BookWyrm @ Dec 4 2006, 07:36 PM)
QUOTE (bishop186 @ Dec 3 2006, 05:06 PM)
QUOTE (SL James @ Dec 3 2006, 06:00 PM)
Inappropriate link removed
-eidolon

Yup, that was definitely NWS.

O_O
OK, what was that (or at least, what was that from)?

It was a blurry motivational poster of a naked model firing off a machine gun of some kind. You can find it in Crimsondude's motivational posters if you are interested in seeing it.

Tagline was
A street samurai's wetdream
Wow did you see that gun?

Yes, I saw it just before the link was wiped. Thought I had seen in in a movie or something, but I may be mistaken.

Lindt: Yes, I know what you mean. When I saw the commercial for it, I was eek.gif . I have seen the painball sniper rifles & had thought that was the absolue limit. I remember the original (one was soft-white, the other polish-black streamline) Lazer Tag rifles from way back. Whoof. eek.gif
eidolon
Just fyi, saying "paintball sniper rifle" will get you laughed off the field.

(They don't exist, all "manufacturers taking advantage of new players by slapping the word 'sniper' on upgrades" aside. wink.gif)
hyzmarca
They do if you load rifle cartridges with paint capsules instead of bullets.
My paintball rifle is an M-16, biatches
Ryu
They´ll not laugh, but you will not get to play at all. Unless you provide the other players with the same "high tech helmet and body armor" that the air force uses.

But I can see this in the decadent 2070.

What you really get them is a hot-sim cybercom link with remote always-on-switch. Never was parenting that easy, and now your team-mate has no excuse for not helping you out in a pitch.
hyzmarca
QUOTE (Ryu @ Dec 6 2006, 11:49 AM)
They´ll not laugh, but you will not get to play at all. Unless you provide the other players with the same "high tech helmet and body armor" that the air force uses.

"Listen, I've brought 2 magazines with me. This one, marked with the blue paint, is loaded with paint capsules. The other is loaded with NATO ball ammo. I'm going to play with you, one way or another. Which way is up to you."

The biggest advantage of using paint capsule simmunition rather than standard paintballs is that you can always pop in a live magazine.
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