Think about what fun you could have if wireless energy/induction over bigger differences were possible . .

Don't get me started.

it'd give jump-starting a completely new meaning and would be responsible for metal fillings being banned as a war crime . .

Well if I remember correctly Tesla had to have special plates in the walls. Would be an interesting scanner type. Someone with cyberway walks through starts convulsing in pain and starts sparking.

As would anyone with a pin in their knee, a pacemaker, or a spinal rod, a belt buckel, or...

Time to pay that extra money to get non-conductives. And I can't imagine extreme enough to get belt buckles. At least back then it wasn't. Think of the era and tell me that Tesla wasn't wearing some metal in his shop that had lit lightbulbs all around him that weren't connected to anything. But I do get your point. It would be more for the "back to purity" types. Lodges and the like.

Defibrillator.

...

What? My Father has one installed in him.

More from my campaign intro notes, this time faux-Jackpoint inserts:
"All right, so probably it's time for the "Where do shadowrunners come from?" question. Well, you know, daddy, mommy...
> Can we skip this bit? - Slamm-0!
> At least the daddy and mommy part. - Netcat"
"You can also fake your own death. Pretty hard these days, but doable. Especially when you have enemies, and a lot of them. Suddenly, it looks like you get blown up in your own car and everyone thinks that someone else bumped you off. And you just fly off to the Caribbean with new papers and a fistful of credsticks.
> That's the good version. - Kes
> How does a bad one look? - Seriously Mike
> You really get blown up, then someone covertly puts you back together and shows you the bill. 50k "debt of gratitude" won't pay itself off. - Kes"
About the A-Kidz:
"Of course, they're sponsored by Horizon, so it's a bit hard to stuff them all in a truck and dump them off a bridge, because you'll piss off the corp. Unless you do it spectacularly - two months ago, Lyran spectacularly trashed two, and in less than ten seconds. One said something nasty about dwarves, caught a Stunbolt to the face, another one jumped to help, she knocked him out with a telekinetic trashcan."
And possession spirits, specifically - Shedim:
"> Wait. Possessed HEAVY DRONE?! Nicks, you're not serious. You CAN'T be serious. I mean... Seriously. You want to tell me that there are DEMONIC EXCAVATORS in this city?! - Seriously Mike"

Heeeee

one shot playing GM premades... I got the troll with the oddest mental stats I have ever played.. but yet fun.

We wind up being a corp team and he started it with the after mission debriefing so we can develop the characters... including the psych test.

GM as doc holds up an inkblot "Okay agent what do you see in my hand" (note: all the previous ones he said what does this image remind ya of"
ME "I see a bit of cardboard wif a bunch of ink spilled on it. The pattern kinda reminds me of soyburgers, mostly cause I am starving"

First night with a new character last night. A social adept elf with a history in alligator wrestling (I don't know why my GM agreed to it either...)

My two cohorts (Our straight faced man and our resident drunken dwarf) and I head to a local bar to canvas for some information. Now, the dwarf and I meta'd a bit, but my last character had a fun little interaction there, so we were hoping to introduce my new character to a certain someone.

The pair of us walk up to him, a hick elf tossing darts in the back and proceed to get hit on.

H-E: "Here, have a drink, it will grow ya some boobies."

Dwarf and I both grab for dice at the same exact moment.

GM: "...You guys are rolling initiative to see who hits him first aren't you?"

Both of us: "Yes."

Dwarf: "Seventeen."

Me: "FUCK. I'll use edge." *roll* "FUCK FINE GO!."

Dwarf: "I kick him in the knee." *roll roll roll*

GM: "You blow his knee out."

Me: "Is he on the ground?"

GM: "...Yes?"

Me: "I HOG TIE HIM!" 'Hey dwarf! Take my picture with him!' *Throws up thumbs up and shit eating grin'

Dwarf: "...Click. There."

Me: 'Take another! Just in case!.' *click* "Okay I'll toss him in the men's room now!"

FYI:
Spending edge to "just go first" is an option.

Ffffffffffffffff!

Notably though, the other guy could do the same, and then it'd be resolved in normal initiative order anyway.

She probably would, have knowing her. LOL!

But it would have been worth it to try

Hehehe... Almost one for the CLUE files.

PCs are investigating an abandoned warehouse for clues. Street Sam is keeping watch outside, Matrix specialist is doing overwatch, infiltration specialist is elsewhere. Mage has Force 3 spirit providing Concealment on self, plus invisibility, otherwise fails infiltration roll. Devil rats are in warehouse; roll perception minus concealment; they smell tasty meat that has been doused in fruity-smelling nomminess (i.e. shampoo), and thus start wandering towards where smell is coming from; they also have Concealment up.

I tell mage to make perception test; between sustaining penalty, Concealment penalty and other penalties, mage has 2 dice for perception... and decides to drop the invisibility spell to get ride of sustaining penalty.

Rats then see tasty meat come into view, and it is not holding a metal stick that makes bright light that hurts, and there are a dozen of them versus one meal.

Rats win initiative, and take the mage down in a single round. Mage's overflow is completely full, but has not yet died.

Teammate hears scream (even with Concealment penalty!) and runs to help; throws Flash-pak at rats, which run, and manages to stabilize mage before mage dies that round. Then takes mage to street doc.

Mage player, "Did I almost get gnawed to death by rats?"

GM: "Phenomenal Cosmic Power! Itty Bitty Common Sense!"

Street Sam: "Over-confident elf--it's what's for dinner!"

Om-nom-nom!

Oh, yeah, and I'm wearing this shirt...

*Chuckles* I wish I had more quoteables, but no games in so long.

My current group is running a tattoo parlor posing as a front for a porn studio as a money laundering front for the Shadowrunning.

They made the "clumsy" looking fellow the piercing artist.

"OH DEAR GHOST, I JUST CAME IN FOR A PRINCE ALBERT!"

"I am the law!"
Yelled as I fired a light anti-vehicle weapon into a slaver who'd kidnapped my street doc.

Ah, memories...

Yeah. Never get between a runner and his street doc. They generally want to stay alive, and being known as the guy who let his street doc get kidnapped is a bad rep when trying to find a new one.

Reminds me of a quote from something I'm reading:

"I want to be alive tomorrow and tomorrow I'm going to want to be alive the next day. Ergo I want to live forever, proof by induction of positive numbers."

"I intend to live forever, or die trying!"

I say that often.

I've told people to carve that onto my tombstone.

The team accepted a job that required them to drive across town.

Team heavy/medic (was a Giant metatype): Well I am going in my sports car.
Elf B&E specialist: I got my motorcycle. So I am good.
Mage: Well how the hell are the two of us suppose to get there?
Face: Guess we can go with the Giant.
Heavy/Medic: Its a sports car. It's got only two seats.
Face: Yeah but its made to have a Giant driving it. I figured me and the mage can fit in the passenger seat. Look like you have your kids illegal in the front seat together, going on trip. With guns. Guns for tots.

Tonight, my mage was riding behind the street sam on his bike. The KE drone brigade was on our asses. Sam decided it would be a good idea if I drove while he fired at the metal behind us. As we stopped, I mentioned his LMG probably wouldn't dent the armor on those things. Sammy stood there, dejected, unsure what to do. I reassured him:

"Just slide behind and grab my piece from my pants."

Took a moment before he realized I meant the APDS-armed Ruger Super Warhawk in its custom holster at my hip.

One of my favorites was a recurring line from our after-action reports (basically, any time someone asked what had happened), "Mistakes were made, [blank] was involved, that's about all we know right now."

I ever tell you about Beartown?

Cyberpsychotic Breakdancing Ork Machinegunner: (after staring mechanically at a can of DW-40 for five full minutes) It... it belongs... inssssside me.

Attractive Female Elven Hardware Store Clerk - (creeped out) It's yours. Just go away and don't come back.

CyberOrk - (twitching, distressed, pleading with dead and empty cybereyes) But then how can I get MORE?

~Umi

You win an internet. too bad it'll be obsolete after the crash but still, bragging rights.

Paranoid hacker to GM (outside of normal gameplay): *Rigger* has a contact in Aztechnology? She must be under ritual mind control! Either I find that ritual link or she's a liability!

Gm: ... Yeah, good luck with that.

He has beaten troll squatters out of his van with nothing more than a lead pipe.

He hacks GridGuide so often, they call him for IT.

He's Gundam, the most interesting Decker in the world!

"I don't always Shadowrun, but when I do, it's Soykaff."

"I will hug the evil out of you!!!"
"Where I come from, trolls don't walk THROUGH the door, they usually open it first."
"Geek the mage first, geek the ork with the big gun next, and call in artillery support for the cybernetic troll."
"I need to do my ANTI-Rain Dance again!" - Crazy Talks, The World's Worst Shaman
"Public Vehicular Fornication?"
"Gecko tape + thermite bars = A Happy Shadowrunner."
"I heard that papered offices are a great idea, you can double-check data that might get digitally corrupted."
"Can I call you back, I'm busy chasing an Indian at the moment..."
"LenseCrafters: 1-Hour Cybereyes while you wait"
"Remind me to pay you... SO I CAN DOCK YOUR SALARY!"
"I'm just sitting on the side, playing Angry Seagulls on my AR."
"It could be worse, you could have dealt with the ideas HE gave me." "I ended up naked, upside down, in a ghoul den."
"I've seen some strange things in my life, and this ain't one of them."
"Buy local, buy knock-off."
"Governor Brackhaven's power bill just went to 5,000,000¥."
"I don't want to use the mop bucket for anything! INCLUDING MOPPING!"
"I own stock in the company that makes Gecko Tape."
"Can someone go and do this delicately please, I forgot how."
"Ho Ho Ho, now I have a fire axe."
"I'm going to strangle the ganger with my scarf and bury him in soykaff cups." - Note: Trips the Elf wears a Fourth Doctor-style scarf
"Even Aztechnology knows shame."
"I got my +5 Mace of get the frag out!" - Gundam providing Geek Cred and Shadowrunner Cred at the same time
"And your Creedence optical chip was stolen, too."

"Brackhaven can take a long, hard suck on me... No, no, no, I know where he's been."

"The Wicked Navajo from the West over here..." "I should be offended by that, but you're white, you don't know any better."

"He eats a box of condoms and dreks dime bags..."

*Clipy Pops Up* "You seem to be having a hard time with your targeting autosoft, would you like help?"

"Don't even bother rolling Drain, you... Oh, wait, you have sucky stats, roll!"

"You have a DocDragon contact?"

"So we have the dogs chasing the walking Dunkie plushies and there's a troll is doing the kickin' chicken in front of the gate..."

"Roll your unarmed by attacking the Electric Fence..."

"Would you like to touch the electric fence again? You had so much fun last time!"

"Sledge open door! Sledge go night-night." "You're pushing that 'Stupid Troll' stereotype a little too far." "Troll take nappy time!"

Farmer John and The Biker With No Name are dragging the big black troll into the back of a panel van...

You know, if you're fast enough, you can get him to the Japanese tattooist at the shop...

"And you're looking down the barrel of the..." "Which gun do you want to use today?"

"Sparky the Technomancer and Crazy Talks the Shaman..."

"I smell burnt toast." "No, you smell burnt troll."

"Look on the bright side, you haven't offered someone as a sacrifice this game!" "Wait."

"She has the portable version of YOUR FENCE!"

"Why would someone FedEx so much Baking Powder?"

So, did you actually get to play or did you have to lead again? O.o

So this is from one of the GURPS games I'm in, but it's too good not to share.

Some backstory:
Javvek (PC, male) and Kiffy (NPC, female) recently hooked up and became an item and had kids.
Some events occur in which an artifact of random magical weirdness is played with (think Deck of Many Things from D&D). Nefris (PC) is crazy normally and ended up with the curse of Gluttony from it. Few days/weeks later, Javvek is telling Kiffy about something that happened with the deck.

Javvek, "Earlier... last time I was back at Daemon's... Nefris went to try and draw another card. I tried to stop her and ended up knocking a card off the deck. Well... I'm pregnant now, apparently."
Kiffy, "You... How... I can't... Uh.. I don't think your parts are supposed to work like that."

From there she started ribbing him about how he cheated on her with a deck of cards. To which one of the other players (playing one of the hatchlings) made the out of character comment, "Now the phrase 'How many cards are in your deck' takes on a whole new meaning for Javvek."

(And that's why PCs and NPCs getting into relationships is alright)

These are from quite a few of my more recent games that I've GMed.

I've been told to stop posting them, however.

Blackmail them:
"I will only post quotes from games that i have to GM. If you want me to stop posting them, you GM for me!"

Everyone is too far away from me to be able to do that.

Hu? You run games for them, don't you?
Why is it difficult the other way round?

I run IRC games exclusively, personally.

I've been relegated to Skype/Teamspeak + Maptool. :<

Will be able to show up for the Mage game this Sunday in person though. It's not far from me, I was just caught by surprise with the prior sessions and it takes an hour to get there (or...for one session I was out of the country and had a different game already scheduled, which I Teamspoke into).

Personally I'm happy to see any of my quotes being concidered quite quotable.

Although I kinda bungled a little in creating my new character I'm starting to get rather fond of the bugger.

Considering the fact that you're the only person that has even come CLOSE to taking out Sledge, admittedly by Overcasting and taking Physical Damage, it's something to be proud of!

Isn't Sledge a friendly for your players? Why would one of your players attempt to take out Sledge?

Because he was stupid enough to charge the electric fence (getting shocked for a THIRD time) and then ran INTO the area of effect of the stunball that was intended for security and guard dogs.

That, and it was the first time anyone even HURT Sledge, so it's a reason to be proud. So far, he's only been hurt by land mines and a bottle of Draino-Brand "Stomach Pump" purgative.

Do I want to know why the latter was applied? Was he having a colonoscopy?

His stomach was transmitting. He wanted it to stop, so he hit the Stuffer Shack, and got himself a bottle of purgative (As I said, "Draino"-brand. "Do not mistake for our other products!").

He then didn't bother to read the directions on the bottle, and chugged it. The group really started worrying when he started puking up blood.

The only size available was the Family-Sized bottle. "I'm a Troll." "And there are Troll Families. That bottle would be one dose for a Troll Mom, Dad, One-Point-Eight Kids, and the Cybermutt. For any other families, it'd be good for two or three doses each." "Oooooooooooooooo, not good."

So, so far they've dragged him into the Street Doc for deafness due to the land mines, and stomach problems. "Get a limb blown off, or something more traditional, man!" as one of his fellow 'runners has put it.

Aztechnology Handler: "I'm still not clear on why you also destroyed the neighboring hydroelectric dam."
Dwarf Pugilist: "Bazongas."
Handler: "...what?"
Ork Face: (eye roll) "He got distracted while aiming the laser designator the first time around."

~Umi