3876: Openly accepting bribes is in bad form.
3876a: Openly admitting that I accept bribes is all right, GM's prerogative.

...3876b: especially if such bribes involve a bottle of single malt Scots whiskey.

I take bribes in the forms of cup cakes, enclaires, doughnuts, and other pastries.

3876c. I am no longer allowed to declare that my bribes are of the things that only one of my players can easily acquire, because she works in a bakery. Its unfair to everyone else.

...mmmmmm, donuuuuuuuts...

3877: I am not to have the Johnson talk like Smithers.
3877a: I am not to have a Lone Star cop that sounds like Chief Wiggam.
3877b: I am not to have a custodian talk like Groundskeeper Willy (a wee nekid lass wi' a beeg guen..!)
3877c: The NPC rigger the team meets up with cannot sound like Otto.
3877d: The leader of the Halloweeners does not talk like Krusty.
3877e: A corp suit is never to say the word "excellent" like Monty Burns
3877f: Universal Brotherhood members are not to use nonsensical phrases like "Okally Dokally" or "Hi Diddily ho"
3878g: a random ganger or street kid is not to go "ha ha" when the PC rolls s glitch.

3879: I am not alowed to describe in graphic detail, how the sweat accumulates under the too tight, transparent synthleather jumpsuit, in the skinfolds of my very fat, female troll samuray NPC 'Fisheye Turner', especialy when it shoots around inside, due to her MBW-controled movements

3879b And if I do it, I'm won't sell them the brain bleach under pain of severe anatomical transfiguration while the whole table steals that brain bleach from me...

3879c: Making another player puke will not get me Karma.

...3880: Mugging UCAS tourists in London is no longer to be referred to as "Cranking the Yanks".

3881: Mugging CAS tourists is just plain stupid, they're all armed. ESPECIALLY the Texans.

Don't mess with Texas! YEEHAW!

*I was born in Houston. Yes, I moved out three years later, but IT COUNTS!!!

...true, but the UK is still a disarmed nation and both the "Nats" and "Triple O" will see to it that it remains that way.

Pack so much as a hold out in your luggage and at the very least, you will find yourself on the next flight back to the colonies (most likely after paying a stiff fine and a having record on file with the Home Office).

3882: Not allowed to drop filled sandbags on the player to simulate Drop Bear attacks.
3882a: Or taze them to simulate electrical attacks or umm... tazing.
3883: Cannot give a long monologue about how my BBEG's monologue will be the greatest oration in history.

3884: 'Ghoul smuggler' does not mean 'zombie pirate'.

Why not?

Well, depends on whether you're a ghoul who smuggles or a smuggler who smuggles ghouls...

Because he's hungry.



The former.

3884a- I am, however, allowed to have a Master Shedim named LeChuck.
3884b- I should refrain from having all of his plans revolve around monkeys, killing some scrawny smart-ass wannabe pirate, and getting the red-headed pirate girl of his dreams.

3884c: I cannot buy a Dues Ex Machina from the "Friendly Local Voodoo Shoppe". They're sold out. They don't have any NERPS, either.

3884d: i cant be lazy and call all alcohole "grog"
3884e: i cant try to send a message to the whole party by singing about how the leg bone is conected to the head bone
3884f: insult dueling doesnt work with pistols
3884g: insult dueling doesnt work with machine guns
3884h: insult dueling does work with WMDs

3885: While my character may call himself a drunken master, he is not allowed to carry a keg around in order to reap the benefits of faster movement and attack speed.
3885a: My drug dealer may not be named Nicholas Sanford, nor does he sell "blue crack".

3885b: Nor red, or green crack.
3885c: Having a research contact named Professor Yakington is right out.
3885d: And no more bets on what the "mysterious tonics" actually do.

3885c: "Blue Meth" is ok though, because that stuff actually exists.

3886: "Heisenberg" only works as a cover name against the illiterate masses.

Which considering the stated quality of education....

...#3887: When fleshing out contacts for the characters in my UK campaign I am not to name the Secretary of Agriculture, "Sir Loin of Beef".
#3887a: Nor am I to name the Secretary of State for Health, "Sir Nigel Crisp".




*...actually, in RL from 2000 -2006, that was the name of the UK Secretary of Health, I kid you not.

Consider the quality of education today... A lot of viewers probably thought he just came up with a bad ass name.

Doesn't he explain it to the kid at one point?

The uncertainty principle guy? I don't get it. Is it because it's the name of the dude that came up with the uncertainty principle or am I missing something?

<-- Undereducated mass?

It's because it's the name of a famous mathematician, and no one on the show realizes it's an alias. They actually think it's his name, even the fairly educated people (Who, admittedly, aren't into mathematics outside of Kilos and Greenbacks.).

And, you do have to admit, as aliases go, it is pretty bad ass, even if you were to realize that it is an alias of a famous mathematician.

Frankly, pretty much everything that character is bad ass, especially when you consider how sick he really is.

Heisenberg would totally work as a cover name against me. There's a couple named that in my apartment building.

Sorry, he's was a Quantum Physicist. Yes, math was important, but that was his actual job/degree.

Further proof you shouldn't post half awake and hung over.

What show was this?

Breaking Bad.
High school chem teacher finds out he has cancer, so he teams up with a drop out to make crystal meth, so he can leave his family enough money to send 3 kids through college.
Oh, and his brother (in law?) is a DEA cop.

Brother-In-Law-In-Law. (Married to his Wife's Sister.). And it's two kids, and making sure his wife will be OK, as they don't pay High School teachers enough, and his Life Insurance is pathetic.

And, frankly, he's massively overqualified for his position. Guy is scary good. Guy is also outright scary.

I sure as hell wouldn't be walking around with a Kilo of Mercury Fulminate in my pocket!

3888: If I have my character walk around with a Kilo of Mercury Fulminate, he'd better have a damned good reason for it, or be insane. Even then, I'm probably looking at needing both to consider it a good idea.

You're right. It's been too long since I've seen an episode.

I had to stop watching it.

Too bad, it was a good show.

3889: If my character tries something "He saw on the 'Trid once.", he shouldn't be surprised when it doesn't work.
3889a: Telling a Magician what (s)he can or can't do based on Karl Kombatmage will result in a severe beating. By an Earth Spirit. Literally, the street will come up and beat the stupid out of me.

3890: I may not introduce a newly made AI to internet memes.
3890a: No, not even then.

3890b: No, the new AI can not haz cheezeburger.

3890c. No, the new AI can not haz penguin. No, not yours.

("no you can not have a penguin no not yours" minus spaces was a former room mate's wireless password. The network name was "Icanhazcheezeburger")

3890d: I cannot make an AI off of Zalgo
3890e: Nor can he be a dissonant paragon.

3890f: Ziggy Stardust is right out.
3890f-I: Actually, any David Bowie character is right out. Too bad.

...3890g: and never, Never, involve the AI in a discussion on Phenomenology.

3890g: Converting a AI to Scientology will likely get the character killed.
3890g-I: [Redacted by the Church of Scientology]

3891: Inglip cannot be a Paragon.

A new meme is found. Hehe. reCAPTCHA has some interesting word pairs sometimes.

3892: I will not try to cram firearms knowledge down my group's throat, no matter how ignorant of the topic they are.
3892a: Explosives knowledge either. It scares them.
3892b: Nor knowledge of how to deal with radiation, earthquakes, floods, or other natural disasters.
3892c: If it makes them go, "HOW THE HELL DO YOU KNOW THIS?", I should probably keep my soypiehole shut.

3893: Spirits of Man summoned by my drug addicted mage cannot look like Charlie Sheen no matter how much of an addict he is.

3893a: No matter how drunk my character is, David Hasselhoff Spirit of Man will not be trying to eat a burger while on the floor.
3893a-I: KITT as a Spirit of Man summoned from a roadway, however, is completely acceptable.

3894: "Bi-Winning" is not a quality, negative or positive