I would love to hear this one.

His mentor spirit is a retarded bulldog, and he is like Yogert from space balls...

He must be from Space Balls 3: (prequil) Yogert's first search for money.

4960: "You'll explode" is not a valid explanation of the results of Drain.

4961: Shouting FUS RO DAH to dragons will only get you funny looks.

At which point you run away.

This is relevant.

What was the shout for Dragonrend again?

4962: Trying to explain "Chunky Salsa" to a bunch of civilians doesn't work well. They'll think it's time to break out the chips.
4962a: I'm to let the veteran of The Sandbox explain exactly what "Chunky Salsa" really is, and why they shouldn't eat it.

Which is why I don't buy chunky salsa anymore. You just don't know who it was, man. You just don't know...

Also, in tune:

4963: Trying to free the team from a confined space using explosives is not a good idea.
4963b: Especially if they are less squishy than you, and have audio enhancements.

Everyone knows thermite is the way to go. Homemade thermite.

Powdering the aluminum is the hard part...

I've actually managed to get that process down to a science.

Just buy it at an art supply store.

But half the fun is making it!

The other half is lighting it.

But if you buy it in powder form you can focus more on getting the mix just right.

4964 : when playing hacker/tms I am not to make the rigger's prize ride do the jitterbug and the hokey pokey while him and the rest of the team are inside laughing at my character...
4964a : especially when said vehicle is a t-bird... those kinds of maneuvers at operational speed are bad for the occupants stomachs.

I honestly love your TM. I want to hear more of her exploits.

4965: I am not allowed to beat someone because I had to describe a 1934 Ford Couple as "The ZZ-Top Car" and still got a blank look.
4965a: Thank goodness someone knew what a 1949 Mercury Eight was.

I veto rule 4965. You have every right to beat them. ESPECIALLY after getting blank looks when described as the ZZ-Top car. Beat their folks for good measure... That's just bad parenting.

I'd have been too easily caught. I'd have used my cane.

Well probably going to have to retire her soon, the group is about to break up when a couple of the team get deployed including the GM

But may reroll her kinda as one to maybe use here on an online game (vs trying to bring her in as is...which is problematic for a lot of reasons due to contacts/gear that is house rules... not to mention she was a 600bp starter, and well high karma game with cash for karma rules as well)

Heads down and muzzles up to them! Stay safe!

I'm sorry. This is probably before my time.

But who the hell is ZZ Top?

(Summary: just because a music group was popular when you were a kid, back in 1969, doesn't mean those of us born post 1980 have automagically heard of them, listened to all of their LPs and know what kind of car they drive)

Should be ok as long as its a Pimp Cane.

*twitch*

I was born in 1988... Must be an old family thing. By old family, I mean my family is old. Usually at least thirty years between generations.




It isn't. It's in another thread of his.

I'll give the the well wishes. GM's a corpseman (so backend vs front end of the pointy stick), the other one bless his heart wound up getting MP as mos..and is getting assigned out to japan either to one of the NAFs or the standard naval bases.

You have no excuse. You have the Internet and YouTube to watch all their music videos with. Also, I had parents who ensured I had a good education, as they're not from "My Time" either. (Although they did get a lot of airtime on MuchMusic back when it played music videos instead of Reality TV.).I'll let you debate if it's pimp or not.

Oh sure, I can look him up (which I did), but it's still not apart of my general knowledge.

As for my family: my parents were born in the early 50s. That puts their first kid (me) at 30+ years too.

Doesn't mean I've heard of ZZ Top. My parents don't listen to music obsessively like the current generation who would all go insane if they don't have their ipod blaring in their ears constantly.

Was "corpseman" an Obama pronunciation/spelling or was it to refer to a dead person?

I don't want a Corpseman being a medic for me.

"I'll get to you just as soon as I'm through killing this guy here."

You don't think dead people would make good medics? You don't really need your brains that much do you?

corpsman, but seems my auto-correct has corpseman in it for some reaso.. oh got to fix that, no longer play that rifts character

Sorry, there was an outtake in Halo 2 that had an officer talk about a Corpseman, and all the wounded he was killing.

Sad things is I knew someone like that. My Sgt had a medic who started patching up a guy who was shooting at his squad moments ago. My Sgt jumped the medic's ass and said to leave the guy there to bleed out. As my Sgt was walking away he heard two gun shots. Turned around and saw the medic had executed the guy. When my Sgt freaked out and asked him why he did that the guy just did that he said "Sgt, you said not to help him. But I couldn't let him die slowly. That would be cruel."

A story you shall have, sir.

I began by starting with a concept, a concept that will remain in infamy, and hopefully never be realized again. I wanted to have the ultimate in lazizness, the supreme lord of "do unto others so I don't have to do for myself". Obviously, a Mage came first to my mind's eye. I continued by maxing out my spellcasting, then I maxed out my summoning, some would say that is the smart choice. I had ulterior motives. I would have no less than 6 spirits to be at my beck and call, to do anything I wished. Sandwiches were weighed with dishes. Laundry with walking my virtual pet! The sky was my limit, until I got the levitate spell, but that comes later. The world was my oyster, and I was too above eating it. And yet a tradition I had not, what is a magician that has no tradition? I had all the proper books to call from, particularly Street Magic, of which was the answer to my problems.

The plot thickened. I saw, as I poured over the lore of mages past and present, a single set of text outlined in a bright glow upon the pages before me. Qabbalist, thought I, "what the hell, why not?" Of course, in Shadowrun, if you're gonna have a stereotype-- Have one in good taste. If you enjoy luke warm Mr. Boston(vodka, plastic bottle, no words can describe), that is. I realized just how sad were my state of affairs when I discovered hard currency was vintage as best, now having a master of all the wizarding world with but a lack of sustenance to drive my materialistic hunger. What is an Acetic Jew to do? Collect credsticks, of course! Why didn't I think-- Oh wait, I did!

So I took to the books once more, having my firmly rooted addiction at hand, I devised a stratagem to cater my focus in spell power to make all the credsticks in the world cower like Pokemon in wild grass (As I think they asexually breed replicating copies of themselves... Or, at least, I hoped I would have similar luck with credsticks. That got boring after an hour of mowing peoples yards. By that, I mean my spirits powers were wasted on such efforts). What to choose first? I shall bar you from the innane details of my drawn out and careful selections, but my final strokes to canvas that held my masterpiece were as follows:

- Hot Potato, for which should I find a person careless enough to be handing that which was rightfully mine, they might think better of it.

-Clairvoyance, so that no home would be safe, no nook or cranny unchecked.

-Detect Object (Credstick), oh this will only get better.

-Improved Invisibility, who needs palming? Forget infiltration! No pocket was safe!

-Levitate, no tower was safe!

-Catalog, no clutter was safe!

-One Less (Nazi), this was just personal flair. I realize now the redundancy of it all. No bad joke was safe!

-Fix, it didn't matter if it was broken.

-Compel Truth, it didn't matter if they lied. Bystanders would direct me to their location.

-Magic Fingers, because I certainly wouldn't use my own hands to dig through rubbish.

-Sterilize, showers took too long.

-Clean Element (Credstick), thinking back, perhaps I was a little too gung-ho, but NO MATTER!

I was set to be useless in all things combat! Never to be hired by any self-respecting Mr. Johnson. I was perfect! Topping it off with a college education in banking just to be safe. All-in-all I was proud of the work I had accomplished. One thing yet remained. A mentor spirit, perhaps?

Ah yes, now I was cooking with gasoline!

Shark perhaps? An image flickered across my vision. Dog, perhaps? A vision flickered across my vision. The thought occurred to me, in all it's retarded magnificence and awkward amusing beauty! Yes Dog would be my spirit guide to the great mysteries of life. I demanded the great spirit grant me one boon, a test and I should be forever his follower.

As the spirits around my luxury grade apartment rented by the hour at 100,000Y sped to clean every spec of Dorito off my floor, I meditated in full garment and glory.

"O' great lord of all things puppy! PLEASE, HERP DERP!"

Then, my dreams were shattered, my plea unanswered... I was shaken from my meditation.

My mom screamed at me, "what the hell are you doing up at 6am?! Go to bed!"

Hmm... Perhaps it was not as funny as I was meant to believe O.o

it certainly was . . different . . interesting . .

Probably had to be there.

4966: I have to stop watching the Unit before game day.
4967: Stop using hand signals infront of the GM with the other players. It worries him. Greatly.

4968: Stop playing little kids that wind up being scarier than a troll with an assault cannon
4968a: Especially little girls!

>.> but I likes being the scarey little school girl that smiles and makes KE run for the hills.. even when she isn't wearing armor or packing heat on her

I scared the group once with a six foot tall troll girl in pigtails and a cute outfit going to the Good Humor Ork (Who also sells some illicit goods out of the ice cream truck), "Hello, I'd like a Vanilla Cone with crushed nightcrawlers please." "Here you go Suzy, how's grade five?" "It's fine. But the desks are so small. Oh, that's my mom, gotta go!" *Looks at the group* "She's going to be a big girl when she grows up."

Dude, for serious? Like, I'm sorry to continue the side-track here...

If you were born in the 80s, you've heard ZZ Top. It would be like saying you've never heard anything by Van Halen.

I was born in the early 80s. My parents were born in the 50s. Admittedly, my father is a bit of a music nerd, but there's no way you missed out on any of their music. They were damn near ubiquitous on radio, on MtV - hell, their music gets used almost as much as ACDC's does for movie trailers, television shows, terrible videos on the internet...

I'm sorry, this is just so surreal for me.

I figured my writing would do the trick, I tried to make the story at least a little bit humorous. Maybe it's more amusing to people who know what all those spells do?

Van who?

Dude, you guys are assuming that my parents played music on the radio. Sorry, but no. There are other stations and other types of music than Rock and Roll.
(Case in point: my mother could have been in an Elvis Presley movie and she said, "Why?")

The point is there are certain musical groups, movies, or images that have permeated the culture to such an extent as to be a touchstone. ZZ Top is widely regarded as one of those music groups. They've produced so much music that has been used in so many other forms of media (band members appear in the tv series Bones and the animated series King of the Hill, an indicator of their fame) that it is generally assumed someone from a developed, western nation and cultural background will be familiar.

So you lived under a rock. My apologies.

OK folks, time to kidnap Draco, strap him in the Clockwork Orange chair (Don't worry, you'll learn what that is too!), and give him an education!

After the first few days, you won't even mind the sleep deprivation.

EDIT: 4969: I am no longer allowed to threaten other members of Dumpshock with the Clockwork Orange chair. Official Shadowrun Forum is still fair game, however.

It's possible that I've heard some of their music, and might even recognize it.

Doesn't mean I know the name of the song, or who wrote/performed it.

And even less so know what kind of car that person drives.

I live under a rock and I know who Van Halen is! Of course that's probably because of Heavy Metal...

But to most people the songs, cars and style are immediately recognizable, that is why everyone is making a big deal about it. Think about it like this, you not being clueless about them would be like your runner not recognizing Grim Aurora or whatever established mega-hit group is popular at your table.