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Full Version: And now a running list of things I am not allowed to do in Shadowrun
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Draco18s
QUOTE (AngelisStorm @ Aug 24 2009, 07:26 PM) *
146. I am not allowed to take a dragon, who lives on a private island outside of Miami, as a ally or enemy.


I think I finally figured out what this is referring to.
Degausser
626: I am not allowed to use the Shadowrun MMO example in the 4th Ed book as a "To do" list for my character.
627: I am not allowed to use my Decker to give the following messages to people's comlinks:
627a: The matrix has you.
627b: Follow the white rabbit
627c: Knock, Knock Neo
627d: *Vertical Scrolling Japanese characters and numbers*
628: I will not have my Technomancer change the default AR theme to "My Little Ponies" when on a run against a megacorp.
629: I will CERTAINLY not do it if said technomancer is a male ork.
630: Rule 628 and 629 also apply to Care-Bears, Monchi-chis, Rainbow Bright, and Strawberry Shortcake.
631: I am not allowed to play a Hacker or Drone Rigger named "Sparticus"
632: If I ever find myself playing a hacker or drone rigger named Sparticus, I am certainly not allowed to write a computer virus that makes droids say "I am Sparticus" whenever I am around.
633: I am not allowed to try and use the above to fool Lone Star.
Machiavelli
634: i am not allowed to let a volcano erupt in Seattle ever again
635: i am not allowed to let other NPC help my PC´s to survive this eruption
636: i am not allowed to introduce the "Doc Stone"-Ghoul Streetdoc Connection to my players
637: i am also not allowed to introduce other ghoul NPC´s in our game, if i don´t want them to get shot immediately
Screaming Eagle
638. I am not allowed to bring real world understanding of computer science to the table.
639. If someone else brings it they are not allowed to use it.
640. If they insist on using it I shall not be responcable for the ensuing anger, screaming, sanity loss or suicides either IRL or in game.
641. I am not allowed to play any character with the motto "Burn them all" and the ability to summon force 12+ fire elementals ever again. That much fun should be reserved for special occasions.
Kumo
642. No more NPC fixers duo Based on Jay and Silent Bob. Ever.
643. If I'm able to forget how does the Combat Damage system work (because of weariness or lack of sleep), I am not allowed to throw devil rats against PC's. One one-hour fight against five "bulletproof" rats is enough.
Degausser
644: The Safety dance does not add do my Dice Pool to dodge, I am to stop testing this theory.
645: Shadowrun trolls do not have regeneration, I am to stop testing this theory.
646: I am no longer allowed to make a troll that is able to pierce a tank with his bow and arrow. That only worked in 1st ed.
647: I am not allowed to replaces ANYONE's Shaving cream with foam explosive.
647a: Especially if it is a 'prank.'
647b: This also applies to DMSO-ed LSD, PCP, Kamikaze, or K-10.
648: I am no longer to refer to Kamikaze as a 'recreational drug'
648a: This goes double for K-10
Adavisk
649: I am no longer allowed to play a drake you is strung out on K-10 all the time
650: am no longer allowed to use shifter regen as my only excuse why i have a auto injector pumping me full of K-10 all during a run (even with the jonson)
651: no one is allowed to get so drunk at the table that they cant remember there die pools
652: I am no longer allowed to come up with "new and innovative" uses for K-10 any more
652 A:launching mortar rounds loaded with K-10 into garden parties while new's crews are there is considered "new and innovative"
652 B:replacing the mages stem patches with K-10 patches, just to see the wimp rip apart a guard is also "new and innovative"
653: not allowed to by K-10 by the gallon, even if i do have the money.
'Sconnie
654: Just because my character happens to be from Quebec, does not give me carte blanche to portray him with my very bad impersonations of former Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chrieten.
Draco18s
QUOTE (Adavisk @ Sep 16 2009, 12:29 PM) *
650: am no longer allowed to use shifter regen as my only excuse why i have a auto injector pumping me full of K-10 all during a run (even with the jonson)


I must do this.

655. I am not allowed to use the 800 BP character build thread for ideas.
Penta
QUOTE ('Sconnie @ Sep 16 2009, 03:22 PM) *
654: Just because my character happens to be from Quebec, does not give me carte blanche to portray him with my very bad impersonations of former Canadian Prime Minister Jean Chrieten.


I'm a bad person, but...With or without the Bell's Palsy?
wind_in_the_stones
656. I am not allowed to create a character based on any television character.
657. Rule 656 deleted as stifling the creation of more rules.
Degausser
658: My dice pools are no longer to enter triple digits.
659: My mage is to no longer beat out the team Street Sam in all combat-related tests (including damage resistance.)
660: No longer allowed to have the spell "Control Emotions"
661: Certainly not allowed to have the spell "Mob Mood"
662: MOST certainly not allowed to use Mob Mood on every crowd, making me feel like a rock star everywhere I go.
663: No longer allowed to erect Physical barriers (as per the spell) to make every grenade a "Chunky salsa" grenade
664: Detox is not a combat spell
665: Even if it can stop anyone on K-10 dead in their tracks
666: I will not make a character based off of the devil, satan, Diablo, or Ray Wise.
'Sconnie
667: I am not to make any more Canadian pop culture or political references, as nobody at my table is going to get it, anyways.
Tachi
666b. Or Bill Gates, which may be redundant, after all, you already said "Satan".
668. I will not send PCs to a crowded public place to meet a new "gray man" contact with nothing more than a general description of said "gray man".

[ Spoiler ]
Stahlseele
QUOTE
666b. Or Bill Gates.

Ever read prime runners? He's in there.
Tachi
QUOTE (Stahlseele @ Sep 18 2009, 03:34 PM) *
Ever read prime runners? He's in there.

Nope, that one's not in my collection, yet.
Lok1 :)
669: No matter how high my gunslinger adapt can raise his agilty he cannot "Bend the Bullett"
670: I cannot pattern a NPC or PC after the Jocker
671:Or the penguin
Thadeus Bearpaw
672. I am now allowed to use a pound of C4 of grenade
673. This is especially true when two members of the group have experience with that and told me that it will not end well
674. This is more true, if one of those players is the GM who works out the damage capicty by range, to indicate party rape.
675. I will not make a character that is completely focused around Edge and has no cyber or awakening who subequently is supposed to be an Infil Street Sam.
676. I will not call up Vinny the Ghoul King to save me from muggers.
677. Even if he's a 6, 6 contact.
678. I will not send the infiltrator in by himself when we know there are spirits are about.
SpasticTeapot
679. Spudguns are henceforth banned.
679a. Especially if you load them with grenades.
679b. Double especially if fully automatic.
WyldKnight
680. My Technomancers are no longer allowed to have their sprites appear as Memes.
680a. Even if it was funny as hell when the rating 6 security rigger got put down by a roflcopter Paladin sprite.
DuctShuiTengu
681: While my hacker may have the knowledge skills to get the reference, this doesn't change the fact that it was a bad idea to send the spider a message informing him that "I'm in ur node, haxing ur ice."

682: Never again call the target ahead of time to warn them to beef up security. No matter how much the street samurai complains that this is going to be too easy.

683: I am not allowed to proposition the Johnson during the initial meeting.
683a: Nor when we're meeting back up to hand over the McGuffin.
683b: Especially not to offer to accept wild sex in lieu of payment for the job.
683c: Even more especially not to include others' share of payment in the offer I'm not allowed to make anyway.

684: Security guards are not just friends you haven't met yet.
Degausser
QUOTE (DuctShuiTengu @ Sep 19 2009, 04:13 AM) *
681: While my hacker may have the knowledge skills to get the reference, this doesn't change the fact that it was a bad idea to send the spider a message informing him that "I'm in ur node, haxing ur ice."


681b: Also not allowed to message "All your n0dez are belong to us!"
681c: Nor allowed to message a copy of the data I just stole with the quote "Matrix Security-You're doing it wrong"
681d: None of these are to be accompanied by a picture of a "Lolcat" with a comlink.

685: Not allowed to get rank 7 in the Knowledge Skill "Pharmasutacles" and make a combat drug that makes K-10 look like Zen.
686: Not allowed to restart the Tempo drug, even if it no longer causes "Unexpected Side effects" (read Ghost Cartels)
686b: Not allowed to restart the Tempo drug, ESPECIALLY if it still causes "Unexpected Side Effects."
687: Despite the fact that you may use Kamikaze, Novacoke is still not "as tame as diet coke."
Draco18s
681e Not allowed to photoshop a picture of lolcat with an implanted comlink.
ravensoracle
688. I am not allowed to make bombs out of pens and hand them out at job fairs.
Orcus Blackweather
689. Nor may I place DMSO drugs in pens to hand out at job fairs.
689 a. Especially K-10
Hagga
690: I am not allowed to roleplay centering actions.
691: I am not allowed to sing "Boys like girls" songs from start to finish as a centering action.
Degausser
692: If I hack a personafix to make someone kill themselves, I am still culpable for their murder.
693: If I hack a personafix to make someone kill others, I am still culpable for that too.
Draco18s
694. I am not allowed to hack the internal PA system for any building containing a large population in close quarters (aka Hotel) and announce that I have released a chemical into the ventilation system that makes the victim hysterical.*

*As this will cause all of the people to vacate the building in hysterics: running, and screaming, and beating each other up. Thus giving me exactly what I wanted, without needing to do anything.
DamienKnight
695. I will not ever refer to Dunkelzhan's assistant as 'his luscious brown elf nipples'.
Draco18s
QUOTE (DamienKnight @ Sep 20 2009, 01:13 AM) *
695. I will not ever refer to Dunkelzhan's assistant as 'his luscious brown elf nipples'.


biggrin.gif

That is sig worthy.

696. As a GM I am no longer allowed to make flamboyantly gay troll NPCs
Namelessjoe
697 im not alowed to mix rockits with any item eg rockit swords, rockit boots,

698 im deeply discuraged to find/buy/build chainsaw launching crossbows


EDIT :

699 im also not allowed to make 15 fully back grounded and stated backup characters in case my guy dies
Stahlseele
Fuck Chainsaw launching Crossbows.
Rocket Propelled Chainsaws is where the Awesome is!
Draco18s
You know you want a rocket powered chainsaw toaster.
Blitzkrieg
700 I will not take Geas True Veganism as the source of my psychic powers.
TeknoDragon
701: Mall Ninja gear is not a suitable abuse of the contents of Arsenal.
StealthSigma
702: I am not allowed to have a Mr. Johnson with a secretary that dresses up as the Joker and Harlequin just so I can make bad Mr. J jokes.
'Sconnie
703: I am not allowed to create a face or any other character based on Vince the ShamWow! guy.
Screaming Eagle
spin.gif
QUOTE (StealthSigma @ Sep 21 2009, 01:28 PM) *
702: I am not allowed to have a Mr. Johnson with a secretary that dresses up as the Joker and Harlequin just so I can make bad Mr. J jokes.

so as long as thats not my ONLY reason its ok... right?
Khyron
QUOTE ('Sconnie @ Sep 21 2009, 02:50 PM) *
703: I am not allowed to create a face or any other character based on Vince the ShamWow! guy.



As awesome as that would be...
Angelone
704: I am not allowed to create a dwarven mage and troll tank combo named Master and Blaster.
StealthSigma
QUOTE (Angelone @ Sep 21 2009, 03:30 PM) *
704: I am not allowed to create a dwarven mage and troll tank combo named Master and Blaster.


704a: Should I ever strike a deal with a person to kill the troll tank in a one on one combat, I am not to renege on my deal when I find out that the troll has a mind of a child as I'm about to issue the coup-de-grace.
704b: If I should violate 704a, I should not be surprised to find myself sat backwards on an ass with some huge silly mask over my head.
Tachi
QUOTE ('Sconnie @ Sep 21 2009, 01:50 PM) *
703: I am not allowed to create a face or any other character based on Vince the ShamWow! guy.


[Vince the ShamWow! guy]The Slap Chop! Watch this! You're gonna love my nuts![/Vince the ShamWow! guy]

Love that commercial.
Damester
705: I am not allowed to subdue bosses in combat force them to smoke leas cigs, knock them out and give them a slight gash on the back of the neck and leave a note saying I have placed a cranial bomb at the base of your spine contact me for more info.
706: I'm not allowed to buy various homes/safe houses through out the campaign and load them all with several pounds of c4 and thermite and set them all to a trigger connected to my biometrics so when i die all the cities i have visitied will erupt in pyres of flames signaling my going and the coming of the apocalypse.
707: I am not allowed to gain entry to an ares facility under the guise of the new guy security guard
707.a: nor will I con fellow guards into leaving me alone in the security room while they fend of the facility from terrorist.
707.b: following that i am not allowed to activate the panic lock down when the guards do leave me alone.
707.c: furthermore i am not allowed to reallocate security for the purpose of helping my running team.
707.d: nor can I hack a fork lift in the cargo bay of the facility and overclock it and use it to impale 1 terrorist while blowing up 4 others.
707.e: and apparently i can't use my vocal implant to play through the building loud speaker in the voice of the terrorist leader that more guards are behind to the ends of having the terrorist blow up other terrorist.
707.f: and finally I can't take all the credit for saving said facility single handed from terrorist attack on my first day and take 6 months paid leave and full security clearance.
707.g: and if i do attempt all of this with out firing one shot again my character will be turned into a black hole....
707.h: Oh and in the aftermath i cannot use my mercury comet outfitted with a rigger to run over cops who attempt to arrest the 1 member of my team who couldn't escape fast enough it is considered to be in poor taste especially while talking to the cops partner. (without batting an eye)
708: I cannot hit on the leviathan in her human form even if i dont know she is a leviathan its just somethings you should know when a women with no implants can pull 4 fully geared runners out of the ocean in one yank.
709: I am no longer allowed to handle the group face as a contact and send him on shopping runs while my character gets nano treatments.
710: Racism against elfs is not allowed if it is detrimental to the 3 elves in party.
711: Its generally a bad idea to propel a npc gang that the gm did not even roll stats for it means you have done something that the gm must watch carefully.
Tachi
712. "Never trust high yield explosives to a meta-human who can't count his toes."

[ Spoiler ]
'Sconnie
713: Corporate bases on the Moon do not have a security detail named "Moon Unit Zappa."
BookWyrm
713b. Nor do the women stationed there wear silver miniskirts, neon-purple wigs, extensive eye-makeup & thigh-high go-go boots.
713c. Nor are they on the lookout for UFOs.
713d. Only a few of these women speak with a British accent.
713e. SHADO is NOT a real organization, nor is it part of any corporation.
713f. Funky-neo-harpsichord music does NOT play on the station's speakers.
713g. The station's commander is NOT named Straker.
713h. When a shuttle arrives or departs, THERE IS NO SOUND in the vaccum of space.
713i. Nor does the exaust smoke.

(sorry, had to throw that little bit of nostalgia in there. If you don't understand my references, click HERE.)
Stahlseele
You know what it is when you don't know that series?
That's right. A gap in education
Orcus Blackweather
I'll take 1960's crappy television for 1000 nuyen.gif

I being an old fogie have this in my educational experience. All of the young whippersnappers of this board are just missing out on the finest things in life.

714. There is sound anywhere that waves may propagate between sound generator and perceiver. If I make enough oxygen flow from the moon base eventually I will hear the high pitched screams of my victims.
715. I will no longer destroy billions of nuyen solely to hear the screams of my victims.
716. Indeed screams are solely a pleasant side benefit, and should never again be my main goal. ::TWITCH:: ::TWITCH:: ::TWITCH::
717. I will never again obey the voices in my head. ::TWITCH::
718. ::TWITCH::
Draco18s
QUOTE (Orcus Blackweather @ Sep 22 2009, 03:11 PM) *
I'll take 1960's crappy television for 1000 nuyen.gif


I'll take popular 1970s films for 2000 nuyen.gif

719. I am not allowed to have lethal does of radiation cause vampires to sparkle.
ravensoracle
720. Even though I have high Palming and Demolitions skills. I am not to secretly slip improvised explosives to random people.
720a. Even if it is to cause a distraction.
720b. Especially not just to see the carnage ensue.
720c. Nor to the corp wage slave just so he can "open the door" for you and your team.
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